Psalm 23
That version was New Living Translation. Actually I think I prefer the New American Standard Version best.

The LORD is my shepherd,
I shall not want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside quiet waters.

He restores my soul;
He guides me in the paths of righteousness
For His name's sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I fear no evil;
for Thou art with me;

Thy rod and Thy staff, the comfort me.
Thou dost prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;

Thou hast anointed my head with oil;
My cup overflows.

Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life,
And I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

Psalm 23.....the real one.....ahhhh....much better
The Lord is my Shepherd;
I have everything I need.

He lets me rest in green meadows;
He leads me beside peaceful streams.
He renews my strength.

He guides me along right paths,
bringing honour to his name.

Even when I walk through the dark valley of death,
I will not be afraid,

For you are close beside me.
Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.

You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies.
You welcome me as a guest,
Anointing my head with oil.

My cup overflows with blessings.

Surely goodness and unfailing love will pursue me all the days of my life,
And I will live in the house of the LORD forever.

Psalm 23...Antithesis by Martha Hornok
The clock is my dictator, I shall not rest
It makes me lie down only when exhausted.

It leads me to deep depression.
It hounds my soul.

It leads me in circles of frenzy for activity's sake.

Even though I run frantically from task to task,
I will never get it done,

For my "ideal" is with me.
Deadlines and my need for approval, they drive me.

They demand performance from me, beyond the limits of my schedule.
They annoint my head with migraines.

My in-basket overflows.

Surely fatigue and time pressure shall follow me all the days of my life,
And I will dwell in the bonds of frustration forever.

Yesterday I tried in vain to net some fish in a home fountain-cum-pond. It's not big at all but the fish were smart & fast from having 3 cats constantly on the prowl for them. It's actually a sad situation. We are taking over the care of the fish because the owner is basically living out the last days and has made the heart wrenching decision to be hospitalised. Cancer is a bitch. I really didn't know what to say being in the house. I wished I was there on a happy occasion. It's sort of a sad sinking realization. The home, the pond, the person.....not terribly close yet still very familiar. I enjoyed quite a few good meals there. They will no longer be. It's different when one knows the other shares the same faith convictions. The belief that it is not the end. Incredible as it seems. This is merely a speck from the perspective of eternity. Until that realization hits home deep in the heart of every loved one I know and care for......I guess there will always be a dull ache and inwardly, a cry for mercy from the Lord Almighty.

These are my new Asics GT 2110. Listen to all this jargon. It's so impressive I have no choice but to be impressed.

Duosole - Asics proprietary approach to outsole construction offers weight reduction, flexibility, traction and durability.

Asics Gel Cushioning System has the ability to absorb shock by dissipating vertical impact and dispersing it into a horizontal plane.

Speva Midsole Material with "Bounce Back" Propertes - Bounces back quickly in preparation for the next foot strike. Special polymers break down at a slow rate increasing durability.

It also has I.G.S. - Impact Guidance System.....whatever that means.

Last but not least, it has 3M Scotchlite Reflective Material. It enhances safety at night and in low visibility situations by creating a bright image - returning the light back to the light source.

I've decided that I am never running at night. It's really tragic how the jogger was killed in the hit & run right in his own condominium.

Elliott sprang to action yesterday morning to fix his dad a Father's Day breakfast. He had the kopi-si just the way his dad likes it. But the waffles didn't quite pan out. It's the frozen type that you just stick in the toaster oven till brown & crispy. Well, apparently he didn't toast it long enough. So it was still frozen inside. But he enthusiasticallly piled on the maple syrup and presented it to his dad. Somehow 'nuking' the whole thing didn't quite have the desired effect. Ah....but it's the thought that counts right?

Visited both my uncles' (my mother's brothers) in hospital today. They're in for different things and were even in ICU two beds away from each other for a day or two. ICU is very different now. Unfortunately, I have a very vivid memory of what ICU was like when my mother was there. Sigh...such is life. Of course, one's perspective of life makes such a difference in these matters. Think my younger uncle has it right. He is bravely battling a incurable medical condition that slowly but steadily diminishes his lung capacity. For daily living, he is dependent on pure oxygen through nose tubes. But he is ever grateful for another day that the Lord gives him. He remains joyful.

Great stuff to chill out to.......
Very listenable. Still distinctly Sergio Mendes' sound. Bossa nova, samba....snippets of addictive melodies. But with a fresh injection of rap,hip hop etc. It's a collaboration with a bunch of people, primarily Will.i.am of Black Eyed Peas fame. I really like the collaborations with John Legend and Stevie Wonder.

My resting heart rate is 48 beats per minute.
This was taken just after I woke up and still in bed.

Target Exercise Heart Rate
My maximum heart rate is 220 - 41 (my age) = 179.
My target heart rate during exercise should be 70% of maximum = 125 beats per minute.

What an enjoyable read!
I completed it in two sittings. Very engaging & easy to digest. Delightful doses of witty English humour here and there. Plenty of references to movies and thought-provoking truths to be gleaned from there. Some snippets that pulled me in very quickly:
One other factor that has led some people to feel that God might exist is the human sense of loneliness, emptiness and restlessness, not to mention our sense of the infinite. That's why the background story of The Matrix is so ingenious: it feels like it might be true. In the film, Morpheus tells Neo:
Let me tell you why you are here. It's because you know something. What you know you can't explain but you feel it. You've felt it your entire life. There is something wrong with the world. You don't know what it is, but it's there, like a splinter in your mind driving you mad. (p3)

I like his explanation of how to define sin.
According to the Bible, sin is ignoring God in the world he has made. But why is ignoring God in this way so serious? Because it cuts us off from God. Because every time I insist on my independence in a world where God sustains everything, I am cutting myself off from the very source of all life. The Bible is clear that to live like that results in death - and not just death here, but eternal death. (p16)

There's self-depracating humour too.
And yet, if I'd listened to my conscience during the month of May, I'd now be - according to Men's Health anyway - a 'leaning tower of power', as opposed to a wobbling vat of fat. Not only that, but listening to my conscience - and by that I mean the God-given sense of what is right and what is wrong - will affect far more than my body. It will affect the destiny of my soul. Why? Because 'we are the choices that we make'. (p94)

What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul? Mark 8: 36,37

How I spent last Saturday...........
'Christianity Explored' is a name of a book by Rev Rico Tice and Barry Cooper. They're from All Souls Church, Langham Place, London, UK. It's also the name of a 10-week course aimed at people seeking to explore Christianity. In a nutshell it will answer who Jesus is, why He came and what we are to do about it. These two fellows were in town and they gave a crash course from 9am to 4pm.

Impossible to do justice to all that was covered but these are the key things I came away with.
The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. - 2 Corinthians 4:4.
We preach Christ, God opens blind eyes.
God created the world, created light....God can recreate our hearts.
But we have to be honest about God's wrath and the reality of judgement. We are not good people going to heaven, we are bad people not going to hell. God's judgement is proof that He's good.

There is so much wrong in the world because there is something wrong with us.....our hearts. The world is not the way it is supposed to be. We are not the way we are supposed to be. Each of us has a heart problem. Also otherwise known as sin. The heart of sin is ignoring God. We are in dire need of rescue. If we reject Jesus and continue in our sin, He will respect our decision.

For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities - his eternal power and divine nature - have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse. - Romans 1:18
Personal application. Pray that Jesus would be an unavoidable issue in the non-believer's life. Need to weep more for the lost. Where are the tears?

Off tangent thought. That infamous author Dan Brown has, in my personal opionion, helped to raise the topic of Jesus. It is up to us to take full advantage of it and steer it in the right direction.
We preach Christ, God opens blind eyes.

Bethany Methodist Nursing Home
Followed the WTWF on their community outreach to the 'Faith' womens ward. Apparently this ward is very pampered because our church has adopted it and there are many such visitations. WTWF engaged the entertainment services of a quintet of what I would describe as 'high quality chinese opera sans costumes karaoke singers'. Yes, those who desired could follow the bouncing dot on the lyrics on the TV. After that, we played 'pass the parcel'. Just about everyone is in a wheelchair so much aid was needed to pass the thingies around. Some got the parcel and didn't want to pass it on, not comprehending the game. I felt awful but had to pry it away to keep the game going. There was one lady that caught my hand and refused to let go after that. Think human touch is highly valued and sadly few and far between for some, perhaps.

Then we played Bingo! It was quite funny. It was semi-orchestrated so the winners were evenly distributed around the room. Next was lunch. About half the residents could feed themselves, but the other half needed to be fed porridge. Whatever the case, just about everyone had a really healthy appetite. That's great, I think. The lady I fed was mildly ravenous and she whacked a to-the-brim bowl of porridge. To be cautious about choking, we were using teaspoons. Can you imagine? Hmmm.

We passed out presents after that and engaged in ad-hoc chatting. Particularly impressed by one 88 yr old who entertained us with a cantonese ditty about Jesus being born in a manger. Despite her appearance and age, she sang with gusto, firm tones and loudly. She ended off by clutching the chain and cross around her neck, lifting it up for us to see and then rendered this valuable advice " lei kei ju". That means ' you must remember' - the cross that is.

Sore Throat Battle Aids
I'm under attack and these are my weapons. No household is complete without a bottle of Nin Jiom Pei Pa Koa. There are two items (#8 & #11) on the ingredient list that sound rather dubious but since it's all herbal, I just close two eyes. The most effective but eye-squinting concoction is actually the honey-apple cider vinegar combo. I was told to drink the cider vinegar 'neat' for a really bad sore throat. Cannot imagine. Vinegar, by the way, is also the most effective way to rid 'pee assaulted' floor areas. Takes away all hint of any uric acid smell. I purchased many a bottle of vinegar when Baobei was being toilet trained. Last but not least is the Strepsils Gargle. This is very 'laht' but I believe it kills all the germs in the throat and numbs it so I can get a good night sleep without feeling that awful lump every time I swallow.

I believe wholeheartedly that..........coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.

The day's catchphrase for me.....
This is taken from the back page of the Straits Times Classified. There's always some sort of self-improvement or motivational article contributed by different life coaches, best sellling authors etc. Today's was written by John C Maxwell, well known author of Leadership books & former pastor.
I like this part when he is quoting someone's advice on life and how it pays to do a little extra planning....

It's important to run not on the fast track, but on your track. Pretend that you have only six months to live, and make three lists: the things you have to do, those you want to do, and those that you neither have to nor want to do. Then, for the rest of your life, forget everything on the third list.

This is absolutely hilarious. Who says Singaporeans are not creative?

POEM ABOUT PAP MP
>
>Recently, my white MP,
>Knok on my door, and very kek ki..
>Say 'I've worked so hard, so vote for me',
>'Or rubbish won't be cleared, in your vicinity'.
>I said 'Dear MP of my GRC',
>'Dun remember u, so please pardon me'.
>'I only saw you on TV',
>'Dozing off and jiak liao bee'.
>Last GE I voted for thee,
>2% up in GST.
>Cut CPF and up utility,
>Are still very clear in my memory.
>5 years later, then you come to me,
>Fresh from your slumber of ivory.
>Say that only, you can help me,
>Escape from a life of poverty.
>Just take a drive on CTE,
>Count the number, of all the gantries.
>Or squeeze a ride on the MRT,
>That has not been cleared for ye.
>My life since the last GE,
>Has been downhill though I voted PAP.
>If I vote the same for your sleeping spree,
>I can expect the same misery.
>So this time round, I vote for somebody,
>Who will kachiao you, to productivity.
>Forms fill wrong, no big deal to me,
>If there's someone to speak up for ah bee.
>So dear MP of GRC,
>If life no improve, vote u cho simi?

I am coveting this little thingie. Yes....my mind is made up. I like it small because I plan to use it while keeping fit. I've done my research and it's a much better product than the ipod.

This is a funny looking lime plant from my garden. It has a local name but I can't remember it now. It's very bumpy but also very fragrant. There is also another bunch but this bunch looks better. I'm always amazed when the garden produces stuff....because I neglect it completely. I never water the plants. I never fertilize it.

Mother's Day
I heard a lot of noise from the kitchen when I woke up. I knew what the boys were up to. Resisted thinking to myself, " Hope it's not too much of a mess they make in their bid to do something sweet for me. " I was served breakfast in bed. I liked the teamwork. One brought the small table. The other brought the tray. In the end, I brought the tray out to the dining table because it's too weird for me to eat breakfast in bed. What if I leave crumbs and then ants will attack me at night?
My son gave me flowers. His school was smart......I didn't ask how much he had to cough out for that. It's the thought that counts, right?
As anticipated, ate too much food at dinner. We went to that new Shanghainese restaurant near Sixth Avenue. Yanqing's Secret. My fave was the Heavenly Old Duck Soup (milky like fish soup but oh so delicate). The selection of cold appetisers were superb.....especially the 18 seasonal vegetables that were crunchy yet asthetically presented....and the deep fried Shanghainese fish. Everything was excellent....the xiao long bao, the venison, the sweet & sour fish, the sesame pancake, the "mochi"- like dessert with fresh cream & mango.
I weighed 50.7kg before dinner and 52kg after. Oink.

And yet another to cancer.....
Last night I was at a wake at the Christian columbarium in Choa Chu Kang - Garden of Remembrance. Old schoolmate from 25 yrs ago. The breast cancer appeared 4 yrs ago and later became all -over cancer. Could tell as there were the obvious visual side effects of chemotheraphy. There was a sense of peace with the loved ones she left behind....so it was rather pleasant actually. The photo she choose to display was lovely. Glam shot....from her wedding just 7 yrs ago.

Anyway, the photo set me thinking about what it would be like with the new heaven & new earth when Jesus Christ comes back again for us.

Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. (Revelations 21:3,4)

I was wondering what I would look like. Would I look like at my prime? Just like the glam shot of my friend. Doesn't make sense to look like when we kick the bucket.....whatever took us away....disease, age, accident etc.

He who was seated on the throne said, " I am making everything new! Then he said, "Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true. " He said to me: " It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. To him who is thirsty I will give to drink without cost from the spring of the water of life.......(Revelations 21:5,6)

Good that everything will be new....restored....just like we know it, but without all the defects, disease, hurt, broken-ness, whatever.
Then it goes on about those that are

....cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers..........thier place will be in the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death. (Revelations 21:7,8)

I understand the second death refers to spiritual death - the permanent separation from God.

And so.....it's sobering....to process the passing of a person (albeit one I hardly knew). But also good to look forward to everything being made new again. No cancer ever. Yeah.

That's a hornbill!
This pic was taken from the boys' bedroom. There's actually a pair of them. They've been hanging out in our backyard. See our neighbours' roof behind. They traverse left and right on the roof edge and drink water from the gutter there. I understand hornbills mate for life. They're big birds and it's lovely to gaze at them.

Matt's Meditation on Maths
He looks real comfy doesn't he? Yeah....yeah....just look at the stuff that he does his homework with. There's an empty bowl which had noodles, and the cup that had milo, the scissors to cut the noodles.....and the absolute "must have" - the pillow. Guess the maths homework was so riveting that he had to continue the adventure in dreamland. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry when I saw him.

Polling Day
Today's the day. But I'm in the Holland-Bukit Timah GRC which is not contested. So I don't have to vote. Think this place has never been contested....and probably never will be. Last time I voted was way back and for the President - either Ong Teng Cheong or Chua Kim Yeow.
My Progress Package was $200. Tsk. Next time election comes around, think I should move. Don't even get to smell any wiff of upgrading carrot (the one with many zeros attached). I have no idea who my MP is now. But I do remember one Sunday afternoon (last year?) when my doorbell rang. I walked up to my gate to see what the fellow wanted. Turned out he was prepping people to shake hands with Mr Gan Kim Yong . Think my quizzical look revealed what was going on in my head.
Huh? Who's that?
I told him I wasn't interested. But before I knew it, Mr Gan was there sticking his hands out through my gate. So I shook his hands. The impression it left on me was probably not one he was hoping for.
Wah biang. This guy is not very tall hor. He's actually about my height leh. Oh no..I hope all my sons grow up to be taller than that.
Have to say though. Must give him some credit for taking a hot Sunday afternoon to go walk around my estate just to shake people's hands.

Irritating Pop-Up
Every 30 seconds or so there's a little green pop-up box that appears on the lower right side of my computer screen. It comes up & down again. There's a picture of a skeleton head and the words 'Incoming Intelligence' next to it. This is accompanied by a tune I would associate with military secrets. When I click on it, it leads to a 'Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon - Advanced Fighter' home page. Offering a myriad of computer games for $$. Evidently the boys (wonder which one) have viewed this and now I can't get rid of it! It's driving me batty. Batty. Batty. Batty.

Boundaries
Borrowed this book from CCMC library. By Dr Henry Cloud & Dr John Townsend. Speed reading it & midway through now. In a nutshell, it explores how we can have better control of our lives by establishing clear boundaries. Key words are ownership & responsibility. Knowing where personal ownership ends & sticking to it.
Chapter 10 is titled 'Boundaries and Children'. Think this is a very good guideline on the overall big picture look at parenting.

By the time they are ready to leave home, our children should have internalized a deep sense of responsibility for their lives. They should hold these convictions:
My success or failure in life largely depends on me.
Though I am to look to God and others for comfort and instruction, I alone am responsible for my choices.
Though I am deeply affected by my significant relationships throughout my life, I can't blame my problems on anyone but myself.
Though I will always fail and need support, I can't depend on some overresponsible individual to constantly bail me out of spiritual, emotional, financial, or relational crises.

The boundary needs of children are:
Self-protection
Taking responsibility for One's needs
Having a sense of control and choice
Delaying gratification of goals
Respecting the limits of Others

Counting my blessings.....
I'm annoyed at the boys. They're so unmotivated. They seem to take everything for granted. When I think about it...it makes me mad. So there's a blog that I read every now and then to get some perspective. After all, I know academic performance is not really important. There is so much more to life than that. There is so much more to be grateful for. We have tons of fun together as a family. I have the privelege of being a full-time mother. They will have tons of memories of me as a person. I never really had that with my mother because she was busy pursuing a career. And I think that's a key reason why I continue to do what I do.
Anyway, the blog I read is
http://www.evangabriel.blogspot.com/
It's written by the father of a newborn who lost his mother shortly after birth. Fairly recent. Was asked to help pray for this family as they cope. It's quite heart wrenching to read. I can emphathise with the sense of loss. The struggle to move on. And yet...only time can heal these kinds of things. Although I distinctly remember still experiencing moments of deep grief well into my adult years. Infact, I believe I subconsciously loathed turning 40 yrs old because that was the age my mother passed away. For the longest time, I wanted to be like her in that sense. But then God blessed me with children and now I want to live to a ripe old age so I can spank my great-grandchildren. Hah!
So reading Evan's blog makes me count my blessings. It shakes me out of wallowing self-pity. Life is not fair and by all counts, I've got it pretty good.

Being Ourselves
Here's a funny story I heard today. Don't know if it's true or not. But it made me laugh & think you'll enjoy it.

There was a couple that was excited, anxious & looking forward to marriage & living together. But the guy was fearful he'd be loved a little less & be a real turn-off because he had really stinky feet. So he resolved to always go to bed with his socks on. The gal, it turns out, also had a real chip on her shoulder. She had a seriously bad case of bad breath. So she resolved to always brush her teeth as soon as she woke up...and climb back into bed again smelling good.
This couple got hitched. They got a place of their own. They lived together. This 'keeping up of appearances' went on perfectly well for the first six months. Not a hitch. Everything was swell.
Then...it happened. The guy, for some reason, woke up in the middle of the night. He was absolutely distraught to discover that one of his socks was missing! He started scrambling under the bed covers to look for that missing sock. He was really starting to panic....and the frantic searching stirred his wife awake. She was infuriated at being woken up. She poked her head under the bed covers, looked at her husband in the eye and blurted out, "What in the world are you doing???????"
He replied, in total honesty and dismay, "OH NO!!!! YOU ATE MY SOCK!!!!!!!!"

Toward a Stress Free PSLE
The school organised this talk yesterday. So Luke & I made the trip. The speaker Danny Ng is a psychologist, father of two boys & a friend. Was a 3 part talk. First, to both parents & boys. Second, to parents alone. Third, to the boys. End result. To get the boys to agree to a time table. Where the hours for Rest, Spare, Meals, Subjects are all clearly defined. Where the expectations on either side are spelt out.
Actually Luke has a time-table already. But neither of us have looked at it for the longest time. Breaches on either side have made it obselete. We really need discipline to keep to it. I'm awful at that. Truly awful. Think that's why my boys are equally, if not, more awful. This is the way I rationalise it. I'm an awful parent because I was never supervised when I was growing up. And I loathe breathing down my boys' necks. So every now and then, I get a spurt of energy and try to do that. But it is, at best, haphazard.
From listening to all that jabbering yesterday, I also realized that I hardly ever encourage or praise the boys when they do something right. Have to work on that.
Best take away that I wish to implement:
Reward effort, not results.

Cosmic Human Rebellion
That is what sin is all about.
Think LT made a good point last night when he said that most Christians tend to trivialise sin as personal bad habits....personal problems with ourselves. In his notes, he writes:

It is a cosmic rebellion against God led by the first human pair in desiring to become autonomous.
To have an independent knowledge of good and evil.
As a consequence of this fall, humans are experiencing ruptures at all levels of relationships:
Between themselves and God.
Among themselves.
Between them and nature.
Within nature.
Sin is therefore our missing the moral mark set for us by our Creator because we are all partakers in this rebellion.

Now that's worth chewing on for a while.

Bird sh*t
My friends abused me all Easter weekend about my hair. Figured there may have been some truth to the abuse. So yesterday, I told Carleen (my hairdresser) to give me a new look. Some 3 hrs later....I do look somewhat different I think. My head is considerably lighter & cooler. For the first time in my life, the top part of my head was subject to something called a wave perm - to give it some body. The last time I highlighted my head was 20 yrs ago as a college undergrad....a skunk-like orange tip front and back. This time the colour is all over and red! I'm not so sure about the cut & perm....but surprisingly, I like the colour. And so do the birds. Whilst chatting & walking around Botanics this morning with my friend Lynda.....something dropped on my head. It was bird sh*t. Can you believe that???? It was gross...so gross....

Baobei
This is my babe...my little girl. This is where she hangs out all day long...in my kitchen. If I'm sitting on that chair, she'll be sitting beneath me. This is the counter where she occasionally steals food. Sometimes the boys or I take things out of the fridge and if we don't put it further in, she can reach it. As I suspected, she missed me terribly when I took off to HK for a few days. She refused to eat. Tim had to coax her and feed her piece by piece. She was listless and mopey.
Isn't she the prettiest girl ever? Big brown eyes. Black and tan beauty. Best part is her temperament...super, super 'manja' queen.

I can't wait....
For exams to be over. Sounds ludicrous I know. But since none of my sons are the least bit anxious (nor even aware of) the impending exams, I feel like I should be. And so I am. It's 14 days to ET's first paper and 17 days to the other two's SA's (Semestral Assessment). That's 25 days countdown to total freedom where we all can put our brains on the shelf again. Yay!
Spent the beginning of the year looking forward to Ophir & HK getaway. Those two trips came and went and lived up to high expectations. Now I guess I'm looking forward to Church Camp in June and at the moment, Taman Negara sidetrip after camp.
I also have to be more intentional about my fitness training. My plan is to celebrate my 41st birthday doing the 8km Terry Fox Run on Sentosa (up -down up- down terrain). But before that in July sometime, my lunatic ultra marathon geriatric doctor friend is coming back from HK. I want to be fit enough to run McRitchie with her.
I also have a sudden craving to play golf. It's been a very, very long time since I whacked a helpless little white ball and chung-kulled the nice fairways. Yes....have to make time for that this week. Who cares about the gezillion other things I need to do?

The Tan Clan
L to R: Matt Matt, Timmy, Pheng, Lukey, Elliott, Han, Me

Congratulate me. I've figured out how to post pics. Ha! This is a great pic taken by Edward for the CCMC Warmth Booklet. It was tough for him to squeeze all our heads in and he had to change the camera lens a few times. Was taken a few Sundays ago after service. I had to grab the boys and stop them from playing football....and getting all hot & sweaty. Think we all look the same....like ang ku kueh.

Quotables I Like
Came across these in a 'thinking' book I'm currently reading. Want to record them before I forget.

There is an old adage that still speaks:
The world was made for the body, the body was made for the soul, and the soul was made for God.
When that discovery is made and the soul is restored in a disfigured culture, we find the greatest treasure of all - and it is nearer to us than we realize.

"Those who cannot remember the past," said George Santayana, "are condemned to repeat it." (The Life of Reason - Who said what when)

From the year 520 B.C. , some insight from the Prophet Haggai.
"Give careful thought to your ways. You have planted much, but have harvested little. You eat, but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes, but are not warm. You earn wages, only to put them in a purse with holes in it. " - Haggai 1 verse 5,6.

Hong Kong
I'm back. Trip was a blast. It could also have been a real blast because some hikers found a bomb just 300m from where we were staying - HK Parkview. Nuts.
Food
The food was excellent from the moment we landed. I ran all over the airport for some char siew pau because I was starving. We also ate deep fried gau-tou yu (nine stomach fish) in Wanchai at Hee Kee Crab Expert. The kind that melts in the mouth. Like butter. Spicy Thai Chinese seafood in Shek O. Well deserved after a really long hike. Coffee & dessert at a sidewalk cafe people watching (a really 'duh' waiter) in Stanley. Lamb chops at Red at IFC in 15 degree celsius sitting outdoors surrounded by skyscrapers. Daily ABFs with a very attentive & efficient waiter in Parkview.....crispy bacon and all. Yam-cha at Fu Hsing on Lockhart Road. Ate so much dim sum I thought I was going to burst. A visit to a home restaurant called Stella's Hideaway. An oasis of an apartment in a real hole in the wall place. My faves were the tofu coated with salted egg and the chicken in some sort of vinegar sauce. It was a banquet - we had a dozen dishes. Mocha at Starbucks. Pei dan & siu ngor (roast goose) at Yung Kee in Central. Smooth milk drink. Forgotten what it's called in Cantonese but it was nice & sweet. High tea at the Peninsula. And all the time in between some lovely packets of M & Ms, Snicker bars & Maltesers.
Exercise
The 10km Dragon Back's trail in Shek O on a cloudy day perfect for hiking. 5km run on the treadmill in Parkview gym. 50 sit ups to deal with the flabby abdomen. 3 hrs of Badminton with Sifu Pat.
Best part
The company. A few old friends that went to the same school twenty-five years ago. Same sick sense of humour. As one of them put it...like visiting family, only without the stress.
Looking forward to next year's trip already.

Easter getaway.....
It's going to be a gals weekend in Hong Kong. Leaving my husband & boys for some R&R with fellow 41 yr olds. Had this planned since January. Now it's here. It'll be a blast. Bought 1kg of Gourmet Bak Kua for my pal so she can feed her zits. It looks positively deadly - streaky bacon bak kua strips. I know it's supposed to be vacuum sealed but then I don't want to risk having my clothes smell like bak kua. Also lazy to hand carry so this is my mind-boggling dilemma for the moment. I'm procrastinating now. Actually there's a sky high pile of laundry on my bed waiting to be folded. I'm so beat I think there's a possibility I might fall asleep amongst the pile. I'm going to miss my dog but she's going to miss me even more. She'll be absolutely delirious when I get back on Sunday night. So delirious she might even bite me! Well, I better go. Maybe I should just push the laundry pile to one side of the bed so there's enough space to sleep. Deal with it tomorrow. Ha!

In Gratitude
Last week was incredibly busy for me. It was the convergence of academic, personal, ministry, social, household matters all at the same time. Had committments and thus was out every single night. I remember looking at my diary at the start of the week and thinking......oh gosh, I feel tired already. But, I anticipated this and asked my bsf ladies to pray for me. That I would be able to juggle the multiple balls and not drop any. That I would remain energetic and joyful despite the busy-ness. That there would be a proper balance with solitude.
I look back on it and am grateful for answered prayers.

Going off tangent here.

There is an interesting place called Union Square at Amara Hotel. It's like 'the' place to do salsa. It was completely packed last Saturday. Live salsa band. So good I didn't realize the music was actually live. More fun to watch the guys dancing than the gals. Especially since they are Chinese. Ever watch Chinese men do salsa. Not bad really. Almost makes me want to go learn salsa too. Ha! There's also a guy by the name of Archie that has an incredible vocal range and fronts the band inside the wine bar. He sings like a woman. Power packed.

A very different weekend....
Finally got round to visiting City Harvest yesterday. It turned out to be a a healing service as well by Rev Dr Richard Roberts. That was an experience in itself. Going to process the whole thing in my head a bit more. I may not blog about it though. But I'm glad I got to check it out.
This morning I visited Church of Our Saviour. Saw a few familiar faces. Enjoyed the service, sermon & the two testimonies. Some funny things that TG Tay shared:
When people in church ask him if he is working part-time, he tells them that he works overtime. But more importantly, the work he does is lifetime!
When people outside of church ask him what business he is in, he tells them he is in his Father's business. When they inquire what business his father is in, he tells them that his Father is a fisherman!

This afternoon, in continuation of the Ophir trailblazing, a bunch of us had a pleasant walk off the Rifle Range Road to the Tree Tops Trail. It was about a 5.2km walk there & back which took less than 2 hours. We got back to the car seconds before the afternoon storm hit. Then we spent the next 2 hours yakking away over Kopi-cino & Roti Prata at Al-Ameen.

Scrub, wipe, mop, vacuum....
The good thing about inviting people over is the necessity to clean. I was cleaning the house furiously yesterday. And so it looked presentable. That's good. Really want to try and keep it that way all the time.....not only when we have guests.
I found this ditty somewhere and printed a few copies out, laminated them and stuck them around the house so the boys will get the drift.
If it's on, turn it off.
If it's open, close it.
It it's out, put it away.
If it's messy, clean it up.
If it's broken, fix it.
If you can't, then report it.
Do more than what is expected.

What's really going on inside of us....
I am reminded again that nobody really knows what's going on deep inside us. I had the privelege this morning of listening to a few people share a little of what's going on deep...really deep in their hearts. As they were sharing, each was invariably led to moments of such intensity that tears started flowing. I could almost feel the agony....the longing, the pain, the struggle. There were some details although it wasn't necessary.

But then I see these people on a regular basis. We chat. We laugh. We smile. We joke. We share. But beneath all that...all this time there were obviously a lot of other things going on in their lives. Things that are kept hidden from the public. Things that matter a lot to them. After all, we live in a fallen world. Problems are everywhere. There's simply no escape but life has to go on. And so we do. We carry on with the myriad of activities. We are incredibly busy most of the time. Is this a facade we are living then? Who is the real you and me?

I want to kick myself for being so caught up with myself. I didn't take the time to be a real friend. My friend is going through a tough time. Outwardly, things are fine. But deep down, where it really matters, there is pain. And so I resolve to make the time and to take the effort to be a friend. Not just a 'good time' friend but one who can be counted on for the sad or bad times.

Mental block in the kitchen....
Yesterday I was merrily making Luke a cup of horlicks. So I opened the fridge, reached for what I thought was the carton of milk, opened it and poured it into the cup. The liquid that came out of the carton was dark orange. I had grabbed the carrot juice carton instead. Oh dear. For a split second there, I thought he may not taste the difference. But that would've been mean. So down the drain it went.

Tonite's dinner menu was striploin steak. The boys had finished eating. I was mucking about in the kitchen. It was about 9pm. I knew Tim had a meeting tonite but thought he said he was coming back to eat first. Baobei always goes crazy when we eat steak. It's the smell. She propped herself up on the kitchen counter, drooling longingly at the one steak left....for Tim.
So I text Tim:
Baobei is eyeing ur steak. Think i will give it to her.
His reply:
Grrrrr!
I have no explanation for this. But next thing I knew, I was thoroughly convinced that Tim had gone straight to the meeting and wasn't coming back to eat. So I gave Baobei the steak.
Half an hour later, Tim comes back....to eat dinner. Oh dear.
And so the dog got the steak and the head of the household got instant noodles!

Things you don't need to know....
But I'm telling you anyway. Ha!

The Ang Mo Kio Community Hospital is now called the Ang Mo Kio Tai Huay Kwan Hospital. The Buddhists have bought it. From whom I don't know. Brought my mother-in-law there today to get her stitches taken out. My cousin has a clinic there. It was a long & scenic drive. Mainly because I got lost.

The Poh Pia man at Holland Village market is now at the Food Court in Basement 2 at HDB Hub. I really like Toa Payoh Hub. It's so happening. I was greedy and bought 3 poh pias to eat. I was greedier and bought $3 of Rojak. I ate 1 1/2 poh pia & some rojak and felt absolutely bloated.

This morning I did my usual running circuit around the estate. My heart is in good shape but my knee started to misbehave toward the end. Then since I was all gross & sweaty, I grabbed my dog and gave her a bath. I forgot to stretch after my run. My left leg started to stiffen. What is happening to my youthful body? It's disintegrating!!!!!!

Learning Hokkien.....
is as easy as ABC.
Children is kina kia.
Bird is jiao kia.
Korean car is Kia.
Give birth is seh kia.
Furniture is Ikia.
Police is mata kia.
Small house is chu kia.
Handphone is Nokia.
Malay is huan kia.
Hindu is kay leng kia.
Kuai lou is ang mo kia.
Chinese is tng lang kia.
Japanese is jitpun kia.
Bad guy is is pai kia.
Good guy is ho kia.
Person who read this is Gong kia.
If you laugh, you are Seow Kia.
Haha...

Defining what made my day....
Yesterday morning I had a weird sense of satisfaction when I chased after Bus 238 in Toa Payoh. And caught it! I was on my way to Subaru's new service centre to pick up Tim's car. The day before I had proudly acquired my very own EZ link card and put it to good use.

I was also amazed that it only took 30 minutes on the buses 157 & 238 to get from my place (near Eng Neo Ave) to Toa Payoh Lorong 8. That's 5 stars for Singapore's public transport system. Very good. I am so proud. Cheap and good. Fast. Makes me wonder if I should take the bus instead of drive....and always paying for overpriced parking everywhere.

For a change I watched some TV and caught two shows for the first time.

That Mindfreak show by Criss Angel. That fellow looks awful. Hard not to notice that huge cross he has dangling over his chest. Given equal display with his own logo.....a round thingy with a cursive A on it. Looks dubious to me. It's disturbing watching him do his stuff....precognition, seemingly impossible magic tricks. He dared his friend to hit him with a car....and the wall behind him crumbled but he was unscathed. I don't know what the deal is. What awful pact he must have made with the fork holding and two horned variety. Don't want to know.

I was thoroughly amused & captivated by an English show titled Super Nanny. She came to the rescue of a young couple with a bratty 4 yr old kid and his twin 15th month old siblings. Television footage showed this toddler pushing and shoving his siblings. He was totally bratty and rude to his parents. They were on extreme ends of parenting styles. The mother was a total pushover. The dad had zero tolerance. They were confusing their kids.

The thing that stood out for me was how resilient & malleable our children are. They are always ready to change to the way we parent. Guess there's not much choice. But in many ways, they are our victims as we learn to parent. Like my friend mentioned what I thought was an astute observation years ago. There aren't really any bad children. It's the parents. There are bad parents.

CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH....
Was loitering around the kitchen mid morning. Mouth feeling itchy. Spied a big pack of Doritos Cooler Ranch! chips. Tore it open. Told myself I'd eat just a couple to hit the spot. Then the phone rang. Was trapped in a conversation. Actually I was listening and didn't have to say much. Old friend. So I continued eating. The conversation went on for longer than I expected. Kept eating. Couldn't stop myself. Except every now and then to lick the salt & stuff from my fingers. Polished off half the pack. Sigh. Choose to blame the friend who called for keeping me on the phone and inadvertently making me snack longer than I intended.
Get this 'since I already ate so much junk food what's a little more' sensation. Open the fridge. Open the fridge drawer. Grab a Delfi chocolate cereal crunch bar. Tore it open. Indulged. Sometimes it feels so good to be bad.

Day 39
This is taken from Dwight Hill's booklet Mission Critical: 90 Days of Meditations for the Marketplace. Buck shared it with us when we were having drinks at One Rochester few nights ago. It has stuck in my head. It's about the need to 'create margin in our lives'.
Get Less Done but Do the Right Things.
Assess all your activities as to their spiritual authenticity.
Ever get the feeling when you have too many things to do that you don't even know where to start? Then, instead of doing anything...it just feels better to procrastinate. Which makes things worse. Then there are other days when I feel super efficient. Got so many things done. Ah...but were they the right things?
And so I'm going to continue chewing on this thought for the next few days.
What are the 'Right things' that I ought to be doing? And hopefully after I figure that out, I will be at peace with the concept of 'getting less things done'.

Anne Rice
She's written 26 novels. Two I recognise because they were made into movies - Interview with a Vampire & The Mummy. The long list all have pretty morbid titles and I'm guessing shows her past obsession with the dark side of things. Titles like: The Queen of the Damned, Memnock the Devil, The Tale of the Body Thief, Blood Canticle etc. There are about 5 books alone about vampires: The Vampire Lestat, The Vampire Armand etc.
I remember reading in a newspaper article that she has been transformed. Her latest book is titled Christ the Lord: Out of Eqypt. Excellent read. Took me two days to speed read it. I was gripped. The other reason why I had to read it quickly is because I intend to give it to my dad as his birthday present tomorrow!
Time for a quick confession. I wanted this book. But it cost about $60 because it's hot off the press and available only in hardcover. So being the creative economist that I am, I got it as a present. Couldn't resist reading it first. Also I know once my dad is done reading it, it'll likely get passed to my step-mother, then my brother and last my sister-in-law. Hopefully after that, it'll come back to me so I can lend it to all my friends. Ha!
Back to the book. It's a novel about Jesus as a seven yr old boy. It's very interesting angle because it is written in the first person. His family move from Egypt back to Nazareth. He's fully human and yet has some bizarre experiences with supernatural power. The story unfolds as he discovers the circumstances surrounding his birth - the angels, the shepherds, the magi........and sadly, the massacre of all children under 2 yrs old in Bethlehem because of Herod's rage. Rice is known for her historical accuracy in her background settings. I liked this book because it brought to life to a 'Christmas' story that became jaded years ago. It has given me an insight into what it meant to be a Jew...their customs, their practices, their way of life. It so inspired me that I had to pick up my New Testament and re-read the first few chapters of Matthew and Luke. It has added texture to my understanding of the gospels.
My favourite part is actually the Author's Note at the back of the book. It is Anne Rice's testimony. She shares how her historical research led her to the undeniable truth to who Jesus is. It transformed her. Talk about moving from dark to light. Horror movie novels about vampires to Jesus Christ - Light of the World. I think it's wonderful. Imagine her fanbase who will read this book because they like her writing - maybe they will see the light too.

Ledang-ed!
My thighs are still aching and now I know what it feels like to have bad knees. That insecure feeling that the knee may decide not to cooperate and buckle instead. The need to go down steps one at a time in a bid to keep the knee straight.....cos otherwise its just too painful....
The climb was a blast! So glad all of us (11 kids, 9 adults) made it to the summit and back - with little more than some cuts & grazes.....a black toe (not mine!) That was 3 hours up to Checkpoint 4 (to set up camp), 4 hrs up to Checkpoint 8 (the summit) and then 4 hrs down to CK4 again (to eat & sleep). That's 11 hrs of hard labour. Never experienced that before.
The most gruelling part was between CK 5 & CK 6. The gradient - almost vertical. The terrain - big boulders. The method - using all four limbs to haul one's ass up. The equipment - thick ropes with knots to grip on to. The faith - that the hands won't let go and the rope is well secured & won't give way. This part is nicknamed KFC. So deceiving. One thinks instantly of crispy chicken. It stands for 'Killing Fields Climb'.
My fave part. Checkpoint 4. Hot milo & cup noodles never tasted so good. Hot milo....I drank 3 cups. I wanted to drink it all night long. The campsite is right next to these big boulders where the water sits in a natural pool. We all jumped in when we got back. It was cold. My guess is about 20 degrees celsius. But it was so good.
My unfave part. Despite being dead beat. It was impossible to sleep. Too cold. Think it went down to 16 degrees. The ground was hard. The kids were cold. The tent not big enough for all of us.
Now. I'm not touching any more H-2-O (isotonic drink) nor eating any more granola bars. Going to indulge in lots of chocolate. And probably get hold of some deep heat for my aching legs.

My Outgear Climbing Pack
It's a pretty sunflower yellow and has a capacity of 30 litres. Got it for $40+ from Beach Road. Just got done packing it. It weighs 10kg. This is all the nonsense I'm bringing.
A pair of slippers
T-shirt, pants, socks, undies waterproofed in a zip-lock bag
Disposable toothbrush & toothpaste
2 Army ground sheets
Sewing kit
Swiss Army Knife
Transparent Nylon Raincoat (Beach Rd $4)
Lightstick
A pack of Dettol wipes
Disposable Chopsticks
Two 1500ml bottles of water
Four 500ml of H-2-O
Gas cooker & canister - model 206 (Beach Rd $25)
3 packets of milo powder
2 packets of monster noodles
2 Cup Noodles
1 Red Enamel Mug & teaspoon
10 Assorted Granola bars
1 Nifty little torchlight (Beach Rd $4)
Half roll of toilet paper
2 Black garbage bags
Assorted plasters, tweezers
My favourite faded red cap to keep my hair in place

It'd better not rain while we're up there. Better not be so blazing hot either. Not looking forward to the open air anywhere you want to go toilet. Looking forward to......actually I don't know what to expect. Although I went up Mt Kinabalu as a kid, I get the feeling this is going to be quite demanding.

Some Comic Relief.....
Received an email with a list of Ah Beng & Ah Lian jokes. They were all hilarious but this is my favourite:

Ah Lian as phone operator :
>
> Ah Lian goes for a job interview as a phone operator.
> After a short conversation, the manager realizes that Ah Lian can't speak
> decent english and he decides to make it hard for her and says "Ok, I'll
> employ you if you can use 3 english words in a sentence".
> Ah Lian of course agrees. The manager says, "The 3 words are: Green, Pink
> and Yellow.
>
> Now use them in 1 sentence."
> Ah Lian thinks really hard for about 2 minutes, then says, "Hmmm, Ok.
>
> The phone, it went Green, Green, Green, I Pink it up and sez Yellow?"
>

Yesterday I brought Baobei to the vet for her jab. One of those 'kill the bugs living inside her' jabs. She hates it. I always feel awful seeing her legs shake uncontrollably when I put her on that cold stainless steel examination table. So I looked out the window. Never noticed it before. It was a pet columbarium. There's a lily pond on the left and a koi pond on the right. Neat rows of urns in different shapes, sizes & colours. Some of the cubicles have faded photos. Not looking forward to the day when I'd have to deal with that.

Building Bridges
I'm referring to human bridges. Relational bridges. Making the effort to spend time together. Discovering common interests. Creating more shared memories. Aiming for a big memory bank of shared smiles, laughs, whatever. Sometimes talking. Sometimes doing not much at all...but together. The original bridges were actually built many years ago. So it hasn't been difficult to pick up from there. So now I find myself investing time and effort into reinforcing these old bridges. Making them wider, stronger, more stable. My aim is for rock solid bridges. I don't know when these bridges will be needed. But I'm hopeful they will be used. Good thing about retrofitted bridges is that it increases traffic. May start off as tentatively one way traffic. With persistence and grace, it gradually becomes two way traffic. With regular use and more investment, I believe it will be very well utilised. I hope it will be the first thing that comes to mind when the moment is right. The moment of realization that each of us here are actually part of a much bigger plan. The bridges that I spent time investing in would serve the exact purpose for which they were created. The bridge that leads the lost home....to their true home.

The Great Restoration
This is the title of my favourite chapter in John Eldredge's book. I learnt all kinds of stuff. Things I thought I knew about but really didn't. It energized me. Inspired me. Gave me a picture....something concrete to look forward to.
Sharing some insights:
The kingdom of God brings restoration. Life is restored to what it was meant to be.

What happens to Jesus after he dies? He is resurrected, of course. As someone or something else? No, as himself, only healed and very much alive. Then what - float around? No, he has breakfast.

Do you see that eternal life does not become something totally "other", but rather that life goes on - only as it should be.

Dallas Willard wrote, The life we now have as persons we now are will continue in the universe in which we now exist.

The earth has been our home and will be our home in eternity. This is a great consolation. When we place eternity "out there somewhere", in a place we cannot conceive of, we are left longing for home. To lose the only world we have ever known - a world so full of memories, so rich and beautiful, with so much left to explore - is to lose something deep and priceless to our hearts.

The only things destroyed are the things outside God's realm - sin, disease and death. But we who are God's children, the heavens and the earth he has made, will go on.

What will we do in eternity? If all we've got are halos and harps, our options are pretty limited. But to have the whole cosmos before us - wow.

This brings to mind what Dr Tan Kim Huat said in honest hilarity. If all we are going to do in heaven is worship God endlessly, He would simply have made us as one big mouth.
There is one sentence Eldrege repeats a few times throughout this chapter. I'm mulling over it and plan to give it more thought.

We can only hope for what we desire.

Botanics
Once a week I join my friend and we walk all over the Botanics. It's such a lovely, lovely park. Really. It's beautiful. I love the big old trees. I love to walk along the ponds, spot the swans and catch glimpses of fish, terrapins etc. I love to look up and see the sky through the canopy of the tree leaves. The blue sky. The first rays of sun. The endless rows of trees.....the variety appears endless. Green grass. Different types of flowers. The ginger garden. Didn't know about all those varieties of ginger. I love to listen to water too. I always look out for the water features and it makes me smile. We always see a few regulars also. Infact, the Botanics is rather busy in the morning. For all types of creatures - two legged, four legged, wheelchair bound, stroller bound - all sorts. But it just absorbs us all. There's enough room for everybody!
I'm been studying the first few chapters of Genesis in BSF recently. I feel so very happy to be able to walk around the Botanics and imagine I'm getting a glimpse of the garden of Eden. I think Eden was much, much more beautiful than the Botanics though.

John Eldredge
When two people recommend something, I think it's a prompting that requires action on my part. And so I find myself reading The Journey of Desire by John Eldredge. Halfway through now. Very engaging. On one of my favourite topics - deep matters of the heart.
Sharing some sentences that have struck me:
At its core, Christianity begins with an invitation to desire.

But Jesus is quite clear when he speaks of eternal life, what he means is life that is absolutely wonderful and can never be diminished or stolen from you.

We don't need more facts, and we certainly don't need more things to do. We need Life, and we've been looking for it ever since we lost Paradise.

The greatest enemy of holiness is not passion; it is apathy. Look at Jesus. He was no milksop. His life was charged with passion.

Once upon a time there lived a sea lion who had lost the sea.

Think we are like that sea lion. We live in the desert, find shelter under a scraggly tree and derive momentary, fleeting joy from our little muddy water hole. For the most part, we have forgotten what the sea was like and worst still, often lose the desire to get back to sea........where we really belong.

Bathing Baobei......
Was all sweaty & gross after my morning run today. Twas a good time give the doggie the overdue bath. Every now and then, Baobei goes through a shedding phase. It's pretty unappetizing for everyone because there is hair all over the place. Doesn't help that the gentle breeze that blows in also creates a whirlwind of tiny dog hairs scattering about. Personally I find the various hair clumps most disgusting. It's a sufficient mass to pick up as a clump. Like a hair ball. All this leads to the necessity of vacuuming the kitchen a few times a day. Tim suggested I shave her completely. Hmmm......I just might.

The bath itself is quite an experience for both of us. It's downright backbreaking for me. Sends her into the shivers. There I am working up a luxurious lather with all that hair she's got....and there she is, her legs shivering from the perceived trauma I'm putting her through. I don't know why she doesn't like to bathe. I'm as gentle as can be and am talking to her throughout the whole process. It always ends with the requisite powerful 'flick'. You know....to get all the water out of the body. Sends a 360 degree spray of fine droplets of water within a 2-3 metre radius of everything in its path. Today I was wearing my spectacles, so you fellow goggle-eyed compadres will know what that does!

Have a little clarity on how to proceed with the issue in my last post. Patience. Sensitivity.
Something lighter now.

Grrrhhhhh. What's one to do with an extremely endearing son who also happens to be absolutely clueless about so many things. Sigh. Gives new meaning to the name 'blur sotong'. Can't go into details here. I wonder how many times I inadvertently display my awful quizzical look of amazement every day. Somewhere deeper inside me this then translates into a brand new white hair sprouting out on my head. My hairdresser thinks it is not necessary for me to highlight my hair (which seems to be the thing to do nowadays) because I have enough strands of white hair to give that effect. Don't know if that was an insult or compliment. Not that it mattered.

There are too many books to read and not enough time to read them all. Yet I want to try. I'm already in the middle of so many different books. What's one more right? Next book I'd like to get hold of is Anne Rice's Christ the Lord: Out of Egypt. She's a classic example of someone who has moved from darkness to light.

Thoughts today....
Was speed reading through my 'junk' email today. This sentence caught my eye.
I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day, I'd rather have you walk with me than show the way..
Think it's about how action speaks louder than words. You know...walk the talk.
I'm in a bit of dilemma. Had someone spill their guts to me earlier this afternoon. She's had quite the tragic life. Like Job in the Bible. A good chap...but just about everything went grossly wrong. She doesn't see the light at the end of the long, long tunnel. Asking God....why, why, why. Weary and fatigued. Wondering when the roller coaster ride will end. Ready to resign from God...from life. I have no answers. I barely know her but I think I know what she needs. Quite simply....a friend. Should I or should I not? Unfortunately, it's not that simple. There are some boundaries I think I have to respect.

Highlights this week..
Going to Corrinne May's concert on Monday night. She is so talented. Love her melodies, love her lyrics even more. It really resonates with me. I identify strongly with her core values that come through very clearly in her songs. Delightful time catching up with my pal over supper afterward. In a nutshell, we both agreed that life is rich mainly because of our relationships.....with family, friends...and I hope one day soon she will see...also with God.

Tuesday - Two incidents that make me wonder about coincidences that I now choose to believe are in reality divine intervention.
Got a text from a friend in the morning about her choir that would like to visit our church. Shot an email to Pastor Peter. He just happened to be making plans for a Prayer Service and was hoping for some sort of string ensemble. He hadn't even dared think about getting a choir. So I made the connection. Hope it worked.
Got a text from another friend in the afternoon. She was about to go off to SKS to hunt for a guide on studying the book of Esther. She felt a strong prompting to call me to ask if I had anything to recommend. Infact, I did! I had just used what I think is an excellent study guide named Life Change Series by the Navigators. I was so pleased she called that I ended up accompanying her to SKS the next day.

Wednesday - Lovely breakfast with a very, very busy friend. Despite her busy-ness, I was able to spend time with her last Friday as well. Just goes to show.....when there is a will, there is a way. It is very possible to carve out time with people who are so busy all the time. I'm still amazed actually. There was some motivation behind it as she sort of took the initiative to meet up I think. Think everyday I should sing that hymn to remind myself......"make me a blessing, make me a blessing".

Today. Visited my hairdresser. We were talking about the difference in standard of living here and Malaysia. Thought there was some profound wisdom in her statement.
Here in Singapore, you just open your eyes and then start to pay and pay.....

Best news for the year for me so far. My dear, dear friend has been smoke free for 55 days. This is a first in something like 20 years. And so you see, there can be miracles when you believe.....

Bashing!
Last two Sundays was spent bashing through the jungles of Bukit Timah Hill nature reserve. Have to say - that is a very happening jungle. There's such a diversity of terrain there. My fave was the 'Rock Path'. It's almost vertical and it's so fun hauling one's butt up those big rocks. I felt so....Angeline Jolieish. Especially with my brand new waterproof Columbia hiking boots. I was thrashing through the little river path part with no fear of getting soggy socks. I'm depending on them to keep out those awful, yucky leeches that I've heard so much about in Mt Ophir.
Tim, my slave driver, was following Commander Philip's instructions to the letter. He loaded my backpack with a minimum of 8kg! This was achieved rather uncreatively by putting four 1.5 litre bottles of water in there. I thought my neck was going to drop off. It felt like someone kept pulling me backwards.
We bashed around the jungle from 3pm till 6pm. Amazing thing....it was really cool with all that dense foliage above us. Can't say I saw very much though. You see....have to keep looking at the ground. So I see the tips of my boots and the area in front of it...to get the right footing. There are tree roots and rocks, uneven ground all the time.
Looking forward to go shop for a hiking backpack next. Then a five man tent. Sleeping bag. Goretex rain coat. Maybe a parang. Heeheehee.

Close Shave
I think that, unfortunately, there are many negligent drivers on our roads. Today I visited my friend who is recovering from being hit by one such driver while cycling. There were actually 3 out of 4 cyclists that were affected. Thanks to high quality protective headgear and I'm certain, grace from up there....no lives were lost. I was curious if she had given any thought as to why God had allowed this accident to happen and what His purposes could be. She gave a really heart warming reply. Oddly enough, this accident had actually allowed her to start to fulfil 4 out of 5 objectives she had set out for herself last year. Amazing.
My take on this. That we have a personal God who is aware of the deep desires of our heart and seeks to fulfil them. Sometimes.......these are achieved by the most unexpected, and even undesired, ways.

I think life as we know it is very fragile. It tends to be lived by the tyranny of the urgent, and not the important.

The book of Job was written approximately 2000-1800 B.C. I found Verse 7 in Chapter 26 very intriguing. He refers to God:
He spreads out the northern skies over empty space; he suspends the earth over nothing.
The Bible is not in conflict with scientific evidence that is verified years later. Even if it is thousands of years later.

Incredible Stories
Last night I, and a few others, sat listening to our friend share about what God has been doing in her family. We were captivated for more than 5 hrs and still wide eyed with wonder and astonishment at 2am. It was the kind of sharing that came from the depth of her heart....real, personal experiences and encounters of a divine kind. It was about a personal God who performed miraculous healing for 14 health complications. The kind where medical doctors say there was no chance and yet, each and every impossibility was achieved. It was about subtle and overt demonic manisfestations that were silenced and overcome victoriously by calling on the name of Jesus. It was about hardened hearts of stone that have been softened by the love of God. Hands that once held joss sticks on a regular basis now clasped in prayer to God. This scene so impossible only a few months back. Now impossible to deny the supernatural acts and presence of a supernatural God. Now, there are new hearts, new spirits and new desires. Just like those mentioned in Ezekiel 36.
It was about so many "coincidences" that were uncanny. The same thoughts and bible verses that kept popping up at strategic times. Yet through different ways and different people who didn't even know each other. An arrow prayer that was shot up to God and came answered precisely by a timely SMS by an acquaintance. This is goose pimple material. A remark that stays in my mind that was uttered by a pre-believer then:
How come your God is so direct?
It was about passages from Psalms that came 'alive' with such clarity and directness to her doubt, fears and questions. But those Psalms were written 1500 years ago. It was about how the words in the Bible became her lifeblood, and soon the lifeblood of those around her. It was about a pre-believer's description of a vision of Jesus he had seen in his dream. A very clear dream. How did he know it was Jesus? He said.....he simply knew. It was a bright dazzling light and although he could not see the face, he simply knew it was Jesus, the Son of God. It was about an inner peace that transcends human understanding. Logic simply went out of the window. There was no denying the spiritual realm and the spiritual warfare that was being waged. I was and still am awed. Incredible stories......of an incredible God.

CNY 2006
Some snippets of what's been said and done.

On the First Day of the Year of the Dog, I met and was totally enchanted by Felicia, an Italian waterdog. She's a greyish brown dog that looks like a poodle. One of only two in Singapore. She only understands Swedish. Quite unique to watch a Burmese maid speaking Swedish to an Italian dog.

My pimple count: One on my left eyebrow. Two on my forehead. Two on my chin.

Tim (to the boys): If you see Mummy going for the candy, just smack her hand.
Boys (with glee): OK! OK!
Me: Tsk.

Elliott juggling kum.
Me: You better not drop that...

Boys (groaning in the car after the umpteenth visit): Are we going home now?

Things I enjoyed eating the most: Aunty Letty's 'burnt' almond cookies, Aunty Choo's moist carrot cake.

Tim (deeply disappointed that we can't make Aunty May's lunch this year due to clash in days): I don't care. I want to eat Shanghainese nian gao now.

Boys (enroute home...finally...looking somewhat forlorn): Will you let us play Xbox when we get home?

Was great to see Uncle Eng Kheng, despite his failing health, in such a jolly mood and chatting away like I've always known him to be.

Something sobering. Receiving news of a friend's brother who succumbed to cancer on second day of CNY. Went to the wake last night. Reminded me of Christmas eve when I received news of a friend who also succumbed to cancer.