Saturday, December 31, 2005

New Year Resolution
Last day of 2005. Need to have some sort of resolution for 2006. Haven't had time to consolidate my thoughts and make specific plans & goals for next year. The saying "If you fail to plan, you plan to fail" is hanging over my head. I've never chosen a verse as a resolution before so I think this is promising.
Here goes.
But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
Galatians 5:22-3
Looking a little further down, I see
If we are living now by the Holy Spirit, let us follow the Holy Spirit's leading in every part of our lives.
Galatians 5:25
Yup. Sounds good to me.

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Lip Synching, Cross-Dressing & tons of smoke....
The last few days have been very pleasant. I made the effort to spend time with people who matter to me.

Last night we went to entertainer Kumar's new place Gold Dust. This is at Orchard Towers - which does a rather unusual transformation of target audience from day to night. The place was packed and smoky. The lip synching and dancing crew of cross- dressers put on a great show.
My favourite act was the Whitney Houston & Mariah Carey impersonations of the song "When You Believe" (from the Prince of Egypt). Those two fellows were spot-on in the two divas mannerisms. "Whitney" had far better legs and body than any of us real girls there. "Mariah" was like two Whitneys put together. Loved the way they, and Kumar also, can do all that lip vibrations....like the way opera singers do. Outstanding comic relief.

Back to the song. Great lyrics. Good stuff. And I believe it too!
There can be miracles, when you believe.
Though hope is frail, it's hard to kill.

After the show, we adjourned downstairs to Harry's to escape the smoke. We had the ditziest waitress. We were all non-alcoholic drinkers and ordered things like Evian, Pellegrino, Iced Tea & Orange Juice. That bland order must have been so unique in a watering hole like Harry's that she kept forgetting what we ordered. She must've been thinking What's wrong with these people? Why can't they be like other tables and order something alcoholic????
Sheesh.

Back to the song. Good melody. Great lyrics.
Who knows what miracles you can achieve
When you believe
Somehow you will
You will when you believe

Think I will usher in 2006 with the theme of this song ruminating in my head.
Yes, I have a few miracles in mind I would like God to answer.
That would be considered my prayer I guess. They seem impossible at the moment.
But then, perhaps that's why the definition of a miracle is
1. an event recognized as an act of God 2. an amazing event

Monday, December 26, 2005

After Christmas....
It's been nice talking to so many different people over the last few days. The parties started last Wednesday and included a whole spectrum of people - acquaintances, new and old friends, relatives, close friends, people I haven't seen in eons, very dear friends who have come back from other countries etc. But now I'm just about all talked out and one part of me is ready to crawl into a hole somewhere and hibernate for a while. There are also a few people whom I would like to catch up with and wonder how they're doing this season....but haven't done so. Inertia...and a slight awkwardness because our circle of friends are different and paths seldom cross.

The other sobering fact has been the passing of a friend on Christmas eve. I feel for the family because she has two kids...one of whom is the same age as I was when I lost my mother. It will not be easy for the kids to cope. I can remember the pain and the feeling of loss. I really admire my friend for the strength and courage with which she faced her illness . She definitely had the peace of God that passes all understanding and was a testament to His love. I regret not visiting her after coming back from Camerons. We had received the text that she was hospitalised again then, and I had planned to visit. But I was caught up in a flurry of activities and did not make the time.

I am reminded of a quote in an article in yesterday's Sunday Times of a fellow named Ah Hock whose motto in life was to : Treat everyone you meet as if you will be dead by midnight.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Love Actually......afterthoughts
Really enjoyed reading Mel & Cheryl's entries, as well as Claris' on the OC blog. Think they write very well and captured the essence of the whole experience for all of us. I was more of an observer from the periphery but there was no escaping the fact that the Spirit was moving very freely. Personally, I found it very heart warming to see open hearts & hear the testimonies that follow from it. Indeed, OC has made a number of quantum leaps this year and it's exciting to have a glimpse at what God has planned for this vibrant community. Nothing short of life changing transformations I'm sure. All progress has to be tempered with the sobering fact that the awful fellow with the pitchfork is on high alert to inflict some damage somewhere somehow. It is, after all, spiritual warfare.

I had a power nap after coming back on Wednesday. Got a text from a dear friend I haven't seen in ages. So went to Double O (club off Mohd Sultan) that evening to socialise. Haven't seen this bunch in many years. It was slightly surreal to meet up again. It was a real throwback to almost 20 years ago when we were all on the brink of adulthood and leading a life of decadence in a country across the ocean. Some things have really changed.......and other things haven't at all. The conversations flowed freely and many laughs were shared. But at the back of my mind, I couldn't help wondering whether each and every one of them has seen the light.

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Xmas vs CNY
It's impossible to read today's Straits Times without seeing some ad on shopping. On the front page is some short write-up on how the weekend before Christmas (yes, today & tomorrow) are the 2 busiest shopping days of the year! All the shops gear up for these two days....deals galore and open till late. Just the thought of venturing to Orchard Road to battle the crowds gives me a mild headache. Also, I can't stand it that LTA has decided to cash in by charging ERP in the evenings!!!! Plus there is now ANOTHER gantry, in addition to the one at Tangs, just past Plaza Singapura. Talk about cash cow.

I have to confess. I prefer CNY to Christmas. My personal opinion is that it is truer to the meaning of the season. There are too many things about Christmas that are commercialized and in a way, infiltrated by other things. Although I do enjoy things like log cakes, Christmas trees, exchanging presents, attending parties.....and on the rare occasion, shopping till you drop.

When I was standing at the cashier counter at Tangs waiting for my stuff, I found I was staring straight at a sign (behind the cashiers) that said Even wise men seek Jesus. Interesting. What a clever man - Mr CK Tang. I admire that. I remember as a kid that Tangs was not open on Sundays.

To me, the reason for the season is to reflect on the incredible......preposterous even.......idea that God became human. The concept of Incarnation. I think it's mind-blowing. I can only try to begin to grasp it. Is that something like me condescending to be an ant? Not quite I don't think.

For some perspective, I am reminded of my recent plane trip looking out my window on the same level of the clouds, at the tiny little houses and roads from 20,000 ft. I couldn't even see the people because they were too small. The rivers and plots of land were the same size as what I would draw if I were to take my pen and draw some squiggles on a piece of paper. See what I mean. It's a miracle....really.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

One Day Stomach Flu
There are 13 of us travelling together on this trip. One little guy was wretching all the way up from Singapore. We thought he was just car sick. Actually he caught the stomach flu and within the next 2 days, 11 of us came down with the bug. Pretty awful virus. We all took turns making awful noises vomitting everything out. I escaped the vomitting but felt like I was dying with a bloated, gassy abdomen. The house was abnormally quiet yesterday as we all just lay about completely listless. Mrs Wong had nothing to do as even the aroma of food made us nauseous. Amazingly, almost all of us woke up this morning feeling brand new. Yesterday was just a bad memory. Bizarre.

We went to check out the Boh Tea Plantation at Sungei Palais today. There's a cool new building with a cantilevered terrace overlooking the plantation. Gorgeous 180 degree view. Tried a nice light garden tea called Bukit Cheeding.

It's been really wet. We heard that 6 cars were trapped up at Gunung Berinchang yesterday because a landslide had blocked the narrow road. They had to send the Orang Asli with food and supplies for them to stay the night. Just now we saw a helicopter - perhaps to rescue them.




Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Brinchang, Cameron Highlands
I'm sitting in a noisy internet room above a shop. It's buzzing with the sounds of shooting and explosions. On my left is Tim's caddy and on my right a little further is my little caddy. They couldn't be older than Elliott.
We played 11 holes in what must be the muddiest golf course I've ever trampled around in. We had to stop because of the rain. Now I know where my tip & caddy fees have ended up in. They're real cute though and they did a good job as caddies.
We're staying just down the road at a quaint old, old house that overlooks the 8th hole. It's called 'Mount Vernon'. For us Singaporeans who have been to the other Mt Vernon, it's quite amusing to be living in this one.
Best part is that it comes with an excellent cook, Mrs Wong. Her sole responsibility is to feed us silly. She does her job very well. She makes this killer belachan that made her noodles simply delicious. Looking forward to the curry puffs we'll be gobbling down for tea later.

Friday, December 09, 2005

Pong is right about going manual with the gate of course. Can never go wrong with dependable hand and leg work. That is, until one expires I suppose. But such is life....have enjoyed the comfort and ease of automation and thus, I find myself waiting impatiently for the technician to come install a new gate system. Should have been done by now but it rained all morning. I usually like rain but then I really need to get this out of the way so we can leave for Cameron Highlands in peace next Monday. All this, by the way, is costing an arm, a leg and some white hair.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Grrrhhhh........
Need to vent. I'm frustrated at my gate. It's been behaving erraticly. The diagnosis was that the microchip in the panel was faulty. Recommendation - replace the panel. Cost of panel $280. Labour $80. Now the panel is ok but the gate somehow cannot be re-engaged back. Recommendation - replace the motor. Estimate $700-$1000. ARRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Post HCMC thoughts
It was sobering to visit the War Remnants Museum and see all those photos of soldiers, Vietnamese villagers caught up in the decades of war. The cruelty that war times bring out in people. The photos & displays of the people affected by Agent Orange were particularly disturbing. The visit to the Reunification Palace was very educational. It was like a time warp to the 60s. The architecture of the building, the furniture. Apparently it hasn't changed at all since the tanks crashed through the gates in 1975 to give the Vietnamese people the liberation they had been fighting for decades.
Met up with some folks who took us to Cholon, HCMC's chinatown, and we feasted on grilled river prawns (the size of lobsters!), tamarind crab and a very young, tender roast piglet...."siew chi". Really memorable. Afterward, we went to check out a jazz bar. At midnight, all pubs close. So we left and were accosted by some kids trying to sell us flowers. They were hitting Tim because he didn't buy any. Fighting spirit.
Good trip. Also good to be back.

Sunday, December 04, 2005

Impressions of Saigon
I'm in an internet cafe in Pham Ngu Lao, the backpackers location of Ho Chi Minh City, formerly known as Saigon. Sensory overload so I'll just jot down some brief images that remain. There are motorbikes everywhere. It's an national obsession to honk. Of a population of 8 million in this city, nearly half own bikes. Some things I've seen being transported on two wheels rather skillfully: a washing machine, a 12 ft ladder, at least 5 slabs of granite about 6 ft long. Nobody wear helmets here. It's caps & hats, and masks & hankerchiefs around the mouth.
Food is yummy. Had 'pho' (beef noodle soup) twice already, delicious Romano pizza, duck l'orange & crepe suzette at Augustin last night, crispy Vietnamese spring rolls at Restaurant 19 the night before.......juicy swimming crab grilled to perfection.
Some eventful things. While crawling in the Cu Chi tunnels yesterday, I thought the old fellow in front of me was going to have a coronary heart attack. The tunnel was only 20m long but he couldn't take it. It was pitch black and possible to navigate either on all fours, or duck walking. Tim was crawling behind me and taking photos of my behind. Tsk. Those tunnels are something else. A testament to willpower and determination to live. Very ingenious. There are three levels - 3m, 5m and 10m.
Today, we went to check out Diamond Plaza. There was a elderly lady that fell backwards on the escalator. Think it was her first time. Yesterday we went to Ben Thanh market. Reminds me of Chatuchak in Bangkok, though not as big and with concrete floors. Rows and rows of street stalls. Tim is doing more shopping than me. It just gives me a heachache really.
One last image before I sign off. Bottles and bottles of snake wine. I find myself staring morbidly at the various snakes bottled in there. Always the requisite cobra standing straight up giving me the eye. Bleh.

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Gunong Ledang here we come...
I can't sleep so I shall post.
Next March we, and some 30 plus others, are going to tackle Mount Ophir, also known as Gunong Ledang. This is off the sleepy town of Tangkak, some 2 hrs up the North South Highway of Malaysia. Think the peak is 5000 ft. Takes a fit adult about 5-6 hrs. Since none of us are fit, it might take the whole day. Some parts of the climb require using all fours to heave oneself up vertical inclines. This is all very exciting. The plan is to spend one night up there camping near the summit. Tim is nagging me to whip the boys into shape. There are a few waterfalls enroute to the summit. Sounds lovely but what I'm really thinking is.....there'll be leeches lurking in the water.
Many moons ago when I was in Sec 2, I had the privelege of tackling Mount Kinabalu. That's like the highest peak in SE Asia - something like 14,000 ft. Of course, ignorance is bliss and I had no idea what I was getting into. My dad was the BB President then and merrily asked if I wanted to tag along. Sure, why not?
My friend Tina and I were the only girls in a platoon of BB boys & men. We were as slow as snails. I really didn't want to walk anymore...but all these boys (on their way down while we were still struggling to go up) kept telling me that my dad was sitting up on the peak waiting for me!
All the way up I kept thinking to myself - this is really dangerous, it's so easy to fall off and die or get lost, how can my dad bring me up this mountain and not tell me it's so dangerous, i can't believe dad got up there so fast when he never exercises, why can't somebody just carry me up, wow we are really high up......
Well, I made it up and down and so glad I had the chance.
Looking forward to torturing my boys next March. Huh huh huh...

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Nail Art
Finally went to utilise a gift I received for my birthday - a manicure pedicure! Now I can't stop looking at my nails. It's rather nice. I'd post a pic but haven't figured out how to do that yet. Had these cool flowers painted on my two thumbs. That nail artist guy had really steady hands. He managed to squeeze 5 flowers on each thumb. Each flower has 5 petals. Even now, I find myself checking out my thumbs thinking.........that really looks good. The boys were funny. They were sniffing my nails to see if they could get high on the smell. Now I'm beginning to wonder. Will this luxury once enjoyed become a necessity?

Monday, November 28, 2005

Satan's Convention
Just received this email from a good friend. Read it before some time back but misplaced it. Found it thought-provoking then....still do. Sharing it with you.

Satan called a worldwide convention of demons.
In his opening address he said,
"We can't keep Christians from going to church."
"We can't keep them from reading their Bibles and
knowing the truth."
"We can't even keep them from forming an intimate
relationship with their savior."
"Once they gain that connection with Jesus, our power
over them is broken."
"So let them go to their churches; let them have their
covered dish dinners, BUT steal their time, so they
don't have time to develop a relationship with Jesus
Christ."
"This is what I want you to do," said the devil:
"Distract them from gaining hold of their Savior and
maintaining that vital connection throughout their
day!"
"How shall we do this?" his demons shouted.
"Keep them busy in the non-essentials of life and
invent innumerable schemes to occupy their minds," he
answered.
"Tempt them to spend, spend, spend, and borrow,
borrow, borrow."
"Persuade the wives to go to work for long hours and
the husbands to work 6-7 days each week, 10-12 hours a
day, so they can afford their empty lifestyles."
"Keep them from spending time with their children."
"As their families fragment, soon, their homes will
offer no escape from the pressures of work!"
"Over-stimulate their minds so that they cannot hear
that still, small voice."
"Entice them to play the radio or cassette player
whenever they drive." "To keep the TV, VCR, CDs and
their PCs going constantly in their home and see to it
that every store and restaurant in the world plays
non-biblical music constantly."
"This will jam their minds and break that union with
Christ."
"Fill the coffee tables with magazines and
newspapers."
"Pound their minds with the news 24 hours a day."
"Invade their driving moments with billboards."
"Flood their mailboxes with junk mail, mail order
catalogs, sweepstakes, and every kind of newsletter
and promotional offering free products, services and
false hopes."
"Keep skinny, beautiful models on the magazines and TV
so their husbands will believe that outward beauty is
what's important, and they'll become dissatisfied with
their wives. "
"Keep the wives too tired to love their husbands at
night."
Give them headaches too!
"If they don't give their husbands the love they need,
they will begin to look elsewhere."
"That will fragment their families quickly!"
"Give them Santa Clause to distract them from teaching
their children the real meaning of Christmas."
"Give them an Easter bunny so they won't talk about
his resurrection and power over sin and death."
"Even in their recreation, let them be excessive."
"Have them return from their recreation exhausted."
"Keep them too busy to go out in nature and reflect on
God's creation. Send them to amusement parks, sporting
events, plays, concerts, and movies instead. "Keep
them busy, busy, busy!"
"And w hen they meet for spiritual fellowship, involve
them in gossip and small talk so that they leave with
troubled consciences."
"Crowd their lives with so many good causes they have
no time to seek power from Jesus."
"Soon they will be working in their own strength,
sacrificing their health and family for the good of
the cause."
"It will work!" "It will work!"
It was quite a plan!
The demons went eagerly to their assignments causing
Christians everywhere to get busier and more rushed,
going here and there.
Having little time for their God or their families.
Having no time to tell others about the power of Jesus
to change lives.
I guess the question is, has the devil been successful
in h is schemes?
You be the judge!!!
Does "BUSY" mean:
B-eing
U-nder S-atan's
Y-oke?
Pope Urban II's best sermon ever...
The date was 27nov but in 1095. This fellow delivered what historians deem the most effective sermon of all time. Why? It was so eloquent, so effective, so moving.........that it launched the First Crusade. Having seen the movie "The Kingdom of Heaven" (with that dishy guy Orlando Bloom), I get a picture of the passion behind it all. The madness also. Seems so plainly illogical & un-Christian, to try to take back the Holy Land by force. The scary thing to me. There's a catch-phrase in the movie that drives the adrenaline of the people. They rah-rah themselves up by chanting "God wills it! God wills it!". Amazing but history speaks for itself. I believe they believed they were doing the will of God. Their leader affirmed it. The church drove it. How could so many people be wrong & be misled like that? Crowd mentality maybe?
On hindsight though, what they did was not biblical at all. Far from it. So the challenge I think is not to be biblically-illiterate. It's good....important, to know what the Good Book says. Regardless of how moving or 'correct sounding' a sermon or talk is, regardless of how well respected the speaker is......there is no substitute for personal study of what the Bible says.

Friday, November 25, 2005

Yadayadayada.......
One of my favourite persons on this planet shared this piece of information with me.

Vaso-vagal syncope is the medical term for a common cause of fainting. In this disorder, the nervous reflexes which control heart rate and blood pressure behave abnormally causing a drop in blood pressure and a fainting spell.

We are of the same vintage, go back a looooong way....and share this abnormality. When we drink and stand up too quickly, we faint. She suffered the indignity of this in a hotel lobby and had to be carried to her room. I've also landed on a few people unexpectedly and they kindly bore my weight. The conclusion - when we drink, we better not stand up. Thing is....whenever I drink, I also need to use the restroom a lot. Well, when there is a will, there is way - so the saying goes. So I'm thinking.....one day, Tim will come home and wonder where I am. I'll be yelling from the throne:
I'm in here....having my evening cocktail!

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Here's a quickie. Have to go out and eat again. For the record, I'm weighing in at 53kg now. Sigh...
Tonight we're taking them to Sanur @ Centrepoint. That kind of food has to be consumed with a lot of rice. There goes my waist. Like we used to say in school - in through the lips, straight to the hips.
Tim kindly disposed of the vermin last night. He asked me what my preference was - drowning or boiling. I refused to answer. Next I heard this awful squealing from where they were. After a few seconds, silence ensued. I think he chose the latter otherwise the sounds would have been gurgling right?
Stay tuned. My next post is going to be about vaso-vagal syncope. And it is not at all about what one might think it is about!
Extreme Materialism
Tim's cousin & family are in town visiting this week and we've been eating out every day. Been eating way too much. Worst part is the realization that the eating frenzy has begun and will continue throught Christmas & New Year...and only end next Jan after Chinese New Year. Anyway, they've been based in Tokyo for the last few years. Discovered that the Japanese society is extremely materialistic. Apparently there is an obsession to always have the latest equipment. Anything that is over 3 years old loses value & gets chucked. That's how they got their 3 yr old Mazda stationwagon for US$4000. In some neighbourhoods, one can see TVs & other equipment on the roads because they have to make way for the latest stuff. They wanted to bring in their own Thai rice but weren't allowed. So they have to buy the Japanese rice for US$50/bag. Tim's cousin couldn't bring herself to buy fruits for the first year they were there because it was so expensive. I'll have these images in my mind when I visit Vietnam next week - one of the poorest countries in the world.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Thinking happy thoughts
I'm so looking forward to next weekend. I'm going to follow Tim up to Ho Chi Minh City. He has to do business there and we're going to take the weekend before his work to play tourist together. Looking forward to eating. Also, it's always good to get out of Singapore and leave the kids behind for a change. Plan on checking out the infamous tunnels there and do some shopping I suppose. I'm not much of a shopper and I can't bargain for nuts. Got what I think is a great deal on the airfare. The taxes ($50) cost more than the flight ($40) each way. The only other budget airline I've flown is Value Air, so I wonder what Tiger Air will be like. The hotel is going to be free because we're swopping some Amex points for complimentary hotel stays instead. Went to the Queenstown library yesterday to borrow a whole bunch of travel books on Vietnam to read up. During this holiday period, you can borrow twice the number of books with each card - 8!
Trapped the last rat
He's in the rat trap sitting on the grass outside the back of the house. Tim says since he set the trap, it's my job to get rid of it. The little fella looks a lot like what my gerbils looked like. There's no way I'm killing that thing but then I can't let it loose either. I'm in a dilemma...

Monday, November 21, 2005

Reflections from seminar
Last week I attended Benny Ho's seminar titled "Finding Balance in an Overloaded World" at Wesley Methodist Church. Sharing some of the things that left footprints in my head.

stress is not based on circumstances, it's based on our response to the circumstances
that would explain why we all react differently to the same things, eg. deadlines, exams. we can be cool or we can work ourselves batty. just depends on how we react to it. and that it is possible to choose to respond to these things in a calm, controlled manner.

we are living a margin-less lifestyle
best illustration of this is imagining two pages full of words - one with a decent margin on all sides, and another with no margin. when there's no margin, there is no room for error. our lives are choc-a-block with too many things. too busy. there's hardly any room to breathe. for our sanity, we need to put in more margin. the more margin we have, the better our health - be it emotional, mental whatever. margin actuallly grants us more freedom.

we are ruled by the tyranny of the urgent
we are impacted by our surroundings. when in fact, it should be the other way around. we should impact our surroundings.
things that are important may not be urgent. however, over time, the important things WILL become urgent. however, by then, it will be a very differerent ballgame. for example, a teeny tiny cavity. it's not urgent but it is important. because in time, that cavity will get bigger & bigger. it will become urgent when it manifests itself as a throbbing toothache. if too late, it will have to be extracted. big consequence for ignoring the important when it was not yet urgent.

learn to do less for greater impact
we need to prune our activity branch.

There's a lot more but I'm going to stop here and chew on these for a while.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Read this somewhere and heard it mentioned again last night....
Most people buy things they don't need with money they don't have to impress people they don't like!
Think there may be some truth to that...

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Good & Bad Sales Service
Yesterday evening Jean Danker & Rod Monteiro were playing a phone trick live on radio. It was hilarious. I was driving at the time & I was laughing so hysterically, my eyes were tearing & I couldn't see the road properly. Jean Danker made a call and was making inquiries about yoga & pilates classes. Rod Monteiro was making increasingly loud farting noises in the background to give the impression it came from Jean. It sounded very authentic. The sales person was spectacular. Throughout the entire call, he was utterly composed and sounded very earnest. Some of the off beat inquiries included how yoga or pilates could help Jean combat her gassy problem, whether the room was small or big and if it was well scented in the event of her flatulence, and what this sales person could recommend for her to decrease her gaseousness. In the end, they let him in on the prank and bestowed on him some "Best Sales Service" award.

Bad service. I was killing some time at Toa Payoh Central yesterday in between running errands. Went to check out a few health & beauty shops - you know, the type that sells the gamut from cosmetics to shampoo to any sort of toiletries. There are always a few competitors & they're always next to each other. Must be tough for business but I think it's great for consumers. Thought I'd pick up some zit cream for my zits (yes, been eating a lot of chocolates again). Was torn between two brands. Then one sales lady offered her help.
Me: Which brand do you recommend?
Sales Lady: Is this for you?
Me: Yes...need something for my pimples.
SL: Oh....it's for you ah (starts to examine my face in detail)
Me: Yes? (waiting expectantly for an answer)
SL: (continues to look disdainfully at my face...specifically at my pimples)
Me: Err....(furrowed eyebrows..then raised eyebrows indicating I'm still waiting)
SL: (doesn't say anything just continues looking at my face)
Me: Err....Which of these brands is more popular?
SL: Hmmm...actually it depends on what you like lah. (eyes still fixated on my pimples)
Me: Yes...thank you. Think I'll just take this one.
Sheesh! As if I'm not having a bad enough time dealing with my face!

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Sharing about my mother...

This was published in the Presbyterian Messenger on 31st December 1977.

In Memoriam - Koh Choon Neo 1938-1977
It is very sad that in every recent issue of the Messenger we have had to record the death of some valiant Christian leader whom the Church could ill spare in these strenous days. Such a one was Mrs Lee Soo Ann, nee Koh Choon Neo, who died on 18th November and was cremated on Saturday 19th at 4.30pm. The cremation at Mt Vernon was preceded by a funeral service at her home, 11 Victoria Park Road, at 3pm conducted by the Rev Dr Gunnar Teilmann. Dr Frank Balchin led in prayer at the service, the Teachers' Choir sang a beautiful setting of The Lord's My Shepherd, and Mr Fok Tai Loy , a fellow-member of Prinsep St Presbyterian Church and friend of the family paid tribute to Mrs Lee's life and work at the cremation service. People from all walks of life, from the University, the professions, the educational world, the Kuo Chuan Girls' School, the Counselling Centre, the Presbyterian Synod, the Prinsep St Presbyterian Church, and other churches, and from the Metropolitan YMCA gathered to pay their last respects.
Mrs Lee was born in Singapore and brought up at the Prinsep St Presbyterian Church where her whole family attended and as a girl she was an active member of the Girls' Brigade. After University, teacher training and graduate work in California, she was appointed to the staff of the Teachers' Training College and lectured there for many years during the principalship of Dr Ruth Wong. She was married to Dr Lee Soo Ann in Prinsep St Presbyterian Church, they had known each other for many years, and they have two children, Justin now aged 14 and Ming-Ying aged 12.
When Ms Monica Sirkett retired from the principalship of Kuo Chuan Girls' School in 1972, the School Board invited Mrs Lee to take over. During her five years in the School she maintained the good academic standard that had been built up and with the keen cooperation of the School Chaplain, now also the Chairman of the Board, the Rev Lim Kim Toin, and the teachers, kept up the reputation of the school as a vital centre of Christian influence. As Headmistress she was both firm and kind. She never let her attacks of rheumatoid arthiritis which made walking, or indeed any movement, painful and difficult, curtail her activities. She continued to drive her car right up to the end, except when she was off on sick leave. She also joined a group on an educational tour of China. This was typical of her eagerness to widen her horizons and gain new experiences. Mrs Lee showed great energy and determination in seeing through to a successful conclusion the plan to add a third storey with science labs, and a library to the school buildings and in taking a major share in raising the $300,000 needed. Although she was in hospital for a stomach ulcer operation when Ms Sirkett, on a return trip to Singapore financed by the O.G.A., formally opened the new extension, she struggled up to be present a few weeks later when the O.G.A. and the school staff gave Ms Sirkett a welcome dinner. The operation was successful but the strain must have weakened her considerably. Recovery was slow but she insisted on going back to work. However the doctors were not satisfied and so she was admitted to Toa Payoh Hospital for a thorough check-up. While she was there a collapse occurred and she was rushed to Tan Tock Seng Hospital in a coma. Although life was prolonged for several days, in the end, irreparable brain damage made recovery impossible. So ended a life in which much was accomplished in a short time. Her long experience of pain did not embitter Mrs Lee but gave strength to her character and maturity to her outlook. It did not make her a hypochondriac but on the contrary increased her concern for others. This was especially shown in the counselling service for students that she set up in the school and in her taking on the chairmanship of the management committee of the Churches' Counselling Centre directed by Dr Teilmann. Mrs Lee was not afraid to speak her mind and to stand by her decisions but she was always cheerful and welcoming. She had a tremendous zest for life combined with a sincere and unwavering faith. Those who can remember her at the time of her marriage will cherish the vision of a lovely, talented and charming girl. Those who worked with her professionally will remember a sensitive mature woman with a deep belief in education. Those who share her faith, will believe that she receives her reward in the realm of the blessed redeemed, who praise God with unwearied song.

Friday, November 11, 2005

The pest control technicians just left. The dead rat was in the drain - just outside the boys' bathroom. They also found two live rats hiding in Tim's bucket of coral (not being used but meant for the fish tank). Saw them jabbing furiously with their rotans - one escaped, one whacked dead. Now I'm $85 poorer but no choice.
Just as their van leaves, I decide to get my letters from the mailbox. Guess what? There's a dead lizard with ants crawling all over it sitting amongst my piles of letters. AAAARRRGGGGHHHHHHH...............

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Dead Rat
Few weeks back we heard very enthusiastic nocturnal activity going on above our ceiling boards. Sounded like more than one rat....and very heavy-footed fellows on top of that. Like they were playing catching while we were desperately trying to sleep. So, out came the rat poison. This stuff is supposed to make them thirsty and therefore drive them to look for water - so they ought to die outside of the house, in some drain far away. Don't know what happened this time. Now there's a putrid smell that's stinking up the boys' bathroom. It's not the dog doo and it smells suspiciously of death. I dare not look for the corpse. That'll give me nightmares for the rest of my life.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Spiritual Direction
Sharing some stuff I picked up on this discipline. Basically, it is the intention and attention to listen to God. To give my first ear to the Holy Spirit, my second ear to what my heart is telling me and my third ear to the speaker/preacher. It's different, although has similarities, to discipling, mentoring and pastoral counselling. There are differences in the roles of the helper and goals of the learner in those.
The main process of Spiritual Direction is through noticing and paying attention. The key element is silence. The other key difference is that there is no 'advice' given by the 2-3 other people in the group. It's about taking a very intentional step out of the busy-ness of every day life, being silent for a period of time so that I can listen with my first ear to what the Holy Spirit is saying to me. The others may respond to what I shared by asking questions that will help me clarify what I heard or affirming it, by sharing what the Holy Spirit told them.
I was blessed. The hour of silence, to my utmost surprise, flew by very quickly. The two people in my group affirmed & encouraged me in what I inwardly already knew. The verse that appeared through one of them was Ezekiel 36:26
Moreover, I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you, and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.
It's too long a story but basically, that is a very special verse for me. It was just what I needed to hear, to be reminded of, to be encouraged by, to give me the strength and faith to strain forward.....to "press on".

Monday, November 07, 2005

ACSI Gala Dinner
Dolled up a little for last night's dinner and tried to behave myself in the company of the rich and rich. All this in the name of education. Was invited so didn't have to rob a bank. Food was lavish. Ate my four figure $ worth....that's per person. Anyway, there was an auctioneer from Sotheby's who helped to raise mucho $$. The watches....which to me, a watch plebeian....looked like....duh....watches......went for $$$$. Some paintings also. A 1981 bottle of wine...sure hope they stored that properly....otherwise it'd be very expensive vinegar. The bidding was very fast. It only slowed down when Lot 10 appeared.
Lot 10 - Pantheon Grande Reserve Tourbillion.
That's a clock by the way. The starting bid was $25K. Silence. I was really amused when the auctioneer tried to encourage more bids by pointing out how useful it could be.
"What a lovely timepiece. It can help you tell the time accurately. Tell you what time to pick up your sons from school. Tell you what time to send them to tuition....."
It was sold for $32K. What a good man he is.
The other item I found amusing was Lot 12.
Lot 12 - AriesRam 3 wood golf club (signed, SM Goh Chok Tong)
This is terrible but I absolutely loved the picture of that well used....make that, very well used.....golf club. It looks very much like my very well used golf club.
Funny world we live in.
Dogs on water
Happy to report that Baobei does not get sea sick. We took her sailing on Juno (our 24ft sailboat) yesterday. Not sure if she was water-safe, so was delighted that the boys' baby lifejacket fit her to a tee. She stayed in the cockpit the whole time like a good girl. Extremely proud that she didn't do any business....small or big....on board the boat. She exchanged some barks with fellow dogs on water at two fish farms/kelongs we passed along the way. There was 3 ugly mutts on the first one and 7 even uglier mutts on the second kelong. Bestow a new title for her - Baobei the Sea Dog. Still don't know if she can swim or not....

Friday, November 04, 2005

This week was packed. Had to host & facilitate a bsf fellowship lunch on Monday. That evening saw all 50+ relatives at a family gathering. Two uncles are looking decidedly older. One just started kidney dialysis & is really only a shade of his former self. Spent Tuesday from 10am to 10pm in Changi - roasting in the sun all day & playing host to another 50+ friends. Fun and enjoyable day. Wednesday evening - met a bunch of new friends who are living an alternative lifestyle through an old pal - we talked until 2:30am. That was very interesting. Still processing that. Thursday - from 930am to 5pm - in a seminar imbibing content on Spiritual Direction. Still digesting all that info. In the evening, entertained a lovely couple visiting from Hyderabad, India at Indochine at Empress Place. Those chairs are so comfortable and the atmosphere so laid back and dark, I grew increasingly sleepier as the night progressed. Realized I hadn't completed my assigned tasks, so decided to get power nap when got back at midnight - woke up at 2am, completed my tasks at 4am and went back to sleep again. Stupid dog was barking at 5am - let her into the kitchen so neighbours won't complain. Was refreshed at leaders' meeting this morning though bit groggy. Been wanting to take a power nap this afternoon so won't konk out at cell meeting tonight - but too much domestic backlog. Actually still need to make calls to a bunch of people but am procrastinating. More fun typing here trying to reflect on where my week went.....

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

5 Weird & Random things about myself

Mich tagged me for this game.
"Rules of the game: Post 5 Weird and Random facts about yourself, then at the end list the names of 5 people who are next in line to do this. Don't forget to leave a comment that says "You are tagged" in their blog and tell them to read yours."Five Weird & Random facts about myself:

Here goes:
1. In college, I dyed two patches of my hair orange - front & back. Looked like a punky skunk.
2. I am not a true blue MGS girl. Started off at Nanyang Girls School till P5.
3. I had a fave pillow called "nga nga" which I could not sleep without - for like 25 yrs. Could only bring myself to let it go when my firstborn popped out to replace it.
4. I am a closet alcoholic.....oops....*RA-18!*.....make that closet musician. I love to try & play all sorts of instruments but only in the closet. One day I do hope to come out of the closet.
5. I'm an introvert & painfully shy. I smile a lot to disguise this.

OK done. Revealed my guts and all.
I'm tagging these 5:
1. Bethany
2. Ivfen
3. Jermaine
4. Shu En
5. Charlotte

Monday, October 31, 2005

Random rambling...
Can't believe tomorrow will be November! Where did the year go? Looking forward to 2006 - got my diary already! The decorations on Orchard Road are up. They're red. I know it's to usher in Hari Raya &Deepavali...then Christmas, New Year....wonder if they'll keep it for CNY too! Remember reading somewhere (must be ST) that they spend an obscene amount of $$$ on that stuff. Before the year end madness begins, must remember to go slow-mo and spend some time reflecting on 2005.

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Vamoose!
All this while I have been quietly wiping up bird poop in my kitchen & living room. Even had a visitation by two mynahs at the same time who were flapping around my skylight & shat on the SIDE of the wall - which is like thirty feet off the ground. Tim says I have to climb up there to clean it! (gggrrrrhhh......)
But yesterday they stayed away. I took a black garbage bag, put it on a coat hanger, cut strips on the bottom and hung it outside my kitchen door. It looks ridiculous but it seems to be working....

Thursday, October 27, 2005

God's Workshop...
Max Lucado's The Great House of God was un-put-downable, for me anyway. He has great illustrations. This book explains the nuances of the Lord's Prayer by illustrating it with the floor plan of a house. That God's greatest desire is to be our dwelling place - a home for our hearts.
I particularly liked the way he described how creation & all of us in it is God's workshop. If anyone wants evidence of God, just look around.

Behold the sun! Every square yard of the sun is constantly emitting 130,000 horse power, or the equivalent of 450 eight-cylinder automobile engines. And yet our sun, as powerful as it is, is but one minor star in the 100 billion orbs which make up our Milky Way Galaxy....
Consider the earth! Our globe's weight has been estimated at six sextillion tons (a six with twenty-one zeros). Yet it is precisely tilted at twenty-three degrees; any more or less and our seasons would be lost in a melted polar flood. Though our globe revolves at the rate of one-thousand miles per hour or twenty-five million miles per day or nine million miles per year, none of us tumbles into orbit. Our God who "stretches the northern sky out over the empty space and hangs the earth upon nothing" (Job 26:7) also created an invisible band of gravity to hold us secure.

In a earlier blog I had written about how Isaiah also knew (amazingly!) that the earth was round. Both Job & Isaiah lived like......close to 2500 years ago.
Chocolate..
I have to eat some chocolate every day. My fave is Cadbury's Fruit & Nut. Close seconds are M&Ms, Kit Kat. Actually my fave fave is See's Marshmallow but can only get that from US. The current stash I'm working on is some stuff Tim brought back from Italy. Dark choc with strips of orange. It's good & it makes me happy. The day would not feel complete without some chocolate. Lots of stuff has been going on. Been eating more chocolate than usual. I have 3 huge zits to show for it.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

%$#@!%^!!!
A little concerned with the language that the boys hear when they play xbox. Very colourful swear words which may be subliminally picked up and unconsciously repeated aloud. I understand we all need to exclaim aloud sometimes. So I ask what their favourite comic book characters say & give these my approval.
From Asterix there's the following assortment: By Toutatis! By Jupiter! By Mercury! Hmmph! Grummmph!
Interestingly, Tintin doesn't ever exclaim. But I'm partial to Captain Haddock's fave: Thundering Typhoons!
OK, sounds weird but way better than 'sh*t' & 'd*mn'.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

Yummy....
This morning I ate the yummiest 'chai tow kuay'. It was a black beauty, with the right smattering of chai poh, and even had surprising little bits of crispy parts. Best part. It was in an ultra new & clean building at Commonwealth Crescent. This 'wet market' is now a 'dry market' and there's an escalator whisking you up to where the cooked food is.
Kudos to Ms Philippines....
Yesterday saw an article in Today newspaper. Usually the contestants in beauty pageants mutter something about wanting world peace. Well, this wise lady was lamenting the way Filipinas are typecast as nannies. I quote:
"She is someone who gives more than she takes. She is someone you trust to look after the people most precious to you - your child, the elderly and youself. She is the one who has made a living out of caring for and loving other people."
That's worth some reflection.

Friday, October 21, 2005

Duh...
Thought I should read some lighter material for a change. Picked up two NYT bestsellers - 4 Blondes by Candace Bushnell & The Nanny Diaries by...can't remember their names. That saying - garbage in, garbage out. That will explain why this whole week I have not had anything to share. I've been reading garbage. Those books are so fluffy...there's nothing to remember. Back to CS Lewis next week...
Ranting...
I just want to complain about the price of petrol. My latest Caltex bill is almost $500. Maybe I spend too much time driving. Think the car is very inefficient. Calculated it only gives me something like 6km/litre. That's terrible. Might as well get a better looking gas guzzler like the RX-8. Or switch to diesel engine. Get a new fuel efficient car. But then it's got to be big enough so I can be a road bully....so that I will not be bullied in return. The worst drivers on the roads are:
1. Taxi drivers
2. Bus drivers - esp those extra long ones
3. People who own Mercs but have to drive them when their drivers are off duty
4. Women drivers - if you can't beat them, join them.

Monday, October 17, 2005

The Long Wait...
Most people would agree that a good food stall can be identified by the number of people queueing for it. If it's good, it's worth waiting for right?
Last Friday we took some friends to Geylang to chow down on some Crab Bee Hoon. Been there a couple of times, and it has always lived up to its reputation. Never had to wait 2 1/2 hrs though! Knew we were in for a wait when all the tables in the kopi tiam (no air con) were taken. It took 30 minutes for Danny to even come round and take our order. There was a dance of sorts before that.
Sit at the table. Signal at the lady for service. She looks at you & nods. Wait 5 mins. Nobody comes. OK. Signal the lady again. Yes, she nods again. Still doesn't come. Fine. Get up. Go over there and tell her you want to order...at least drinks. She tells you to go sit down then she'll serve you. Fine. Go sit down. Wait some more. Still no service. Signal again. Sigh...you get the picture...
After about an hour of waiting, the sotong arrives. It's absolutely delicious - very fresh, cooked perfectly. Half hour later, the kailan arrives. Again, tantalisingly delicious - loaded with garlic (yummy) and yet decidedly sweet. We debate about whether the chef put sugar.
Finally, almost 1045pm and the Crab Bee Hoon arrives. All conversation ceases as we dig in. It's great to eat crab with fellow crab lovers. Tend to eat more when everyone is eating with just as much gusto. Great - it really hits the spot.
Here's the funny part. To pay the bill, we have to wait again. The funny part is that we actually wait - very guai. We wait another half hour just to get the bill. It leaves a hole in our wallets but we leave like a bunch of happy pigs. We adjourn to join other friends to celebrate a birthday. We arrive there past midnight (tho the actual birthday) after having made them wait 2 hrs for us.
The things we do for food.

Friday, October 14, 2005

Few days ago I met someone who had recently lost a loved one. This loved one had gone the way of Leslie Cheung. So many things in our lives and what's happening in the world raise questions.....of which we may not know the answers to. Perhaps it is because we are only able to view life from one perspective. It's like looking at a huge tapestry but from the wrong side. It just looks like a chaotic mess of different coloured strings. But I believe that there is a bigger picture than the only one I can see. I also believe that one day I will be able to view this huge tapestry from the correct side and realize that it is actually something beautiful - complex, elaborate, very carefully & lovingly woven. To the One who knows the end from the beginning, I shall cling to you as the Certainty among life's uncertainties.

Monday, October 10, 2005

Confession....
It was not a normal day for me. Today I slept for 3 hours after lunch. What a sloth. To make things worse, I ate roasted pork knuckle for dinner. Oink. I think it was because I didn't feel like studying. You see, if I don't study, neither do the boys.
Had a conversation with my second son, Luke, a perceptive 10 yr old:
L: Mom! How come you slept all afternoon?
M: I know...it was really strange.
L: Well, don't say it was because of us!
The deeper meaning to this conversation is that I, as a parent, am always finding ways to blame them for things.
Yesterday, I was almost an hour late arriving for dinner at a friends' place. I blamed it on the boys. There is a ton of white hair on my head. I blame it on the boys. Our home is always incredibly messy. I blame it on the boys. Nobody closed the sliding windows in the bedroom when we went out for dinner. I blame it on the boys. Nobody fed the fish today. I blame it on the boys. The birds are still coming into my kitchen to do their business. I blame it on the boys. After all, they're so messy they must be leaving microscopic specks of food that keep giving these mynahs hope!
Guess it's human nature to always seek to shift the blame elsewhere. My take on this - think the spouse gets off easy when there are kids to take the blame.

Sunday, October 09, 2005

Thanks Cheryl!
I have a tagboard now and I just need to express my deep appreciation to Cheryl for putting it there for me. It would have taken me hours of meddling and I would probably still have pasted it in the wrong place - like the last time!

Friday, October 07, 2005

Thought for the day...
How we define success is important in shaping our lives. So, how should we define success? Success is defined in terms of achievement, fame, recognition, material possessions, and wealth. In a word: outcome.
Significance, on the other hand, while less tangible, concerns the process.
Significance is importance, meaning, essense, relevance, and value. Success drives us by a desire for tangible things; significance guides us by a desire for something greater than just what is tangible.

taken from a book written by some fellow by the name of Larry Julian.....
Snakes....yuck
There's an absolutely disgusting picture of a humongous snake in the newspaper today. It freaked me out but I confess I was rivetted to it for a quite some time. It showed the thick trunk of a 4m long burmese python in the Everglades that 'bit off more than it could chew'. There was a 1.8m alligator with its tail sticking out. Looked like the snake's body just broke in the middle....maybe cos the alligator was wiggling too much.
Awful. Awful. Awful.
I'm so glad the papers were on the table and I was standing whilst reading it. Had I been sitting down and holding it close to my face, with my specs off, it would've been mortifying.
The thing that gets my heart pounding besides vigorous exercise is close encounters of the reptilian kind.....even in picture form. There have been many an occasion where I simply throw the National Geographic on the floor when I turn the page and discover a snake. I usually don't bother to pick up the magazine after that. It's convenient to have children to do these menial tasks when I'm immobilised.
I've also had a few memorable snake encounters in person.
There was the snake that Tina and I thought was dead, wrapped up in a plastic bag and at the bottom of the garbage bin outside her house. To our horror, it came out 'standing' tall and promptly headed for the nearest drain. I've mentioned before how circumstances merely reveal the person. Well, Tina ran after the snake while I ran away from it. It took great persuasion on her side to get me to come help her pin it down.
Then there was the time the snake fell out of the tree and landed merely a metre away from Elliott's pram. I was wondering why this 'green leaf' had the ability to slide away toward the drain. Snakes always seem know which direction the drains are. I'm so grateful I did not walk that split second faster. I always wonder what I would have done if the snake had landed inside the pram. Would my maternal instincts have quenched my fear and gut instinct to run away?
Actually I have a lot more snake stories to share, but think this is enough for one day!

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Birds......
I have a problem with birds and I'm open to any of your suggestions. My kitchen and my dining room attract black minor birds to visit. Baobei hangs out in the kitchen but she's quite useless and they come in anyway. She just looks at them and doesn't do anything. In frustration I ask Tim why they keep coming in, and he says it's because our house is a bird sanctuary. Unfortunately, the correct description should be bird toilet.
They come in, walk around a bit like they're checking my place out....do their business, sometimes several times (to my utter dismay) and then leave. There are some stupid ones that proceed to check out my living room and fly around trying to exit via the skylight but find they can't. All this brings about a degree of nervous anxiety in them, and this brings on even more unwanted deposits. Often these are yellow, but sometimes red.........I suppose it depends on what they've been eating. All the food in my kitchen is put away so there is nothing exposed on the countertops.....things like bananas, bread etc........nothing for them to come in for.
I have invested in waterguns and catapults to tackle this issue. However, after a few stakeouts and some bad aiming, the problem still prevails. Now I resort to closing the kitchen backdoor, kitchen window & dining room sliding door.....sitting there with no fresh air coming in, just so I can minimise picking up bird poop for a change.
Trivia....truth nonetheless
Here's an example of a very subtle truth that is revealed in the Bible that I like.

Isaiah was a prophet who lived in Jerusalem about 600 years before Christ was born. At about this time, the ancient Greeks were only just starting to sail around the Meditteranean and map out their islands. It wasn't until 200 BC that a Greek mathematician calculated what he thought was the circumference of the earth.
But in a description of God's majesty, it is recorded in Isaiah 40:22a:
He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth,
and its people are like grasshoppers.
If not for divine inspiration, I seriously doubt he would have known the earth was round. To think that there was a time when some people even thought the earth was actually flat.
Found!
Ha! Found my key. That was only two days missing. Must be getting better with age. It was in my pants pocket. Good thing I checked before throwing it in the washing machine. Otherwise, it would be a very clean key after that. The image of discovering Elliott's handphone in his pants pocket after washing is still crystal clear in my mind. That was only a few months ago. Yes, it was a very clean phone, no doubt, but had to be laid to rest after meeting its watery death.

Monday, October 03, 2005

Frustration....
I can't find my house key. These things happen to me every now and then and it is very frustrating. The last time it went missing, I eventually found it in the boys' basket of school socks. Don't ask, I have no idea. Then there was the time my watch went missing. For days I was wandering around timeless. Then I discovered it had fallen into the tissue box in my car. I also do this with the multiple books I'm reading. I bring them into and out of the car, into the various rooms at home, sometimes to my in-laws place where I can read a few pages while waiting.............then I forget where I brought them........and the suspense is killing me because what I read is still fresh in my mind, but I don't know where I put the book.
Safe in a Crazy World........
This is a wonderful album from Corinne May. She writes her own stuff (excellent lyrics with great melodies), plays the piano & has the kind of mellow voice that I really, really like. At the risk of sounding biased, she also doesn't sound local at all. The title song of the same name is my favourite track at the moment. I can listen to it over and over and over again........it just connects with my soul.
The lyrics in the chorus go:
You keep me flying
You keep me smiling
You keep me safe in a crazy world
You understand me
Embrace my fragility
You keep me safe in a crazy world

The headlines in the newpapers the last week really point to the fact that we live in a crazy world. That picture of the artic ice having melted so much already was a real eye opener for me. The damage is already done....we'll definitely face the consequences. Then that dreadful warning about how a worldwide flu pandemic is very, very real. The statistics are staggering - about 150 million people can be wiped out. There's no way to imagine that number of people........unless I think about the grains of sand on the beach.
I felt really sh*tty when I saw the headlines yesterday about Bali. Terrible...terrible news. What is wrong with these people? This is the crazy world we live in. In so many ways, it's all gone wrong. All the more, I need to believe that in the end......as in all movies, there is a happy ending. The good guys win, the bad guys lose. Good always, always triumphs over evil.
In another of Corinne May's songs, she writes:
There are a thousand reasons
Why I should give up
But I'm stubborn in the things I believe

I am 'Forever Grateful' (another good song but by Mark Altrogge) for the things I believe in. It is after all....the truth.

Saturday, October 01, 2005

Exam Fever.....
It's that time of the year again. In my family, the level of exam anxiety between parent & child/student is directly proportional. The less anxious the student = The more anxious the parent. Well, my boys are as carefree as wild birds. So I suspect I ought to be busy sprouting plenty of white hairs. One of them is very diligent about studying......every day he gets on the internet, searches a variety of websites, painstakingly studies pages & pages of cheat sheets.......of his favourite computer games.
So I decided I have to sit down with this fella & study also. Life Science is like gobbledygook to me but Geog was fun - especially checking out the atlas. It's a challenge really - much of it still boils down to test taking ability. Just need to strive to maintain the love of learning in there somewhere.
Interesting article in the latest Readers' Digest titled 'I Won't Let Our Boy Go to University'. This father in UK has concluded that "universities more closely resemble job training centres and remedial catch-up courses than they do centres of learning for learning's sake". There's also the factor of high costs and then graduating with a huge debt, and too many graduates chasing too few jobs. Bold move..........perhaps he's right.
I've given this area a little bit of thought and joked around with friends. I would be ok if they didn't go the academic route. They'd be just fine if I have an auto mechanic, an electrician & a plumber at my disposal. Do you know it'll cost me $120 for a technician to come down and take a look at my sliding gate? Look only.......parts & fixing additional. Then there's the cars....every time they go in, it's always a couple of hundred dollars.......and every so often, just add another zero in there. I enjoy watching these Mr Fixit guys do their thing..........and invariably find that I'm muttering to myself that I could've done it. Tim's very wary of me, of course, he thinks I know just enough to be dangerous. He's probably right.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Empathy...
I can now empathize with the batter that gets poured onto the waffle iron........... the two slices of bread that get squashed together to make a tasty toast...........the staple in the stapler.........because I felt like I was being fed to a machine today. Actually it was a mammogram - but I really did feel like a tasty toast - for a few seconds anyway.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Eye Language....
Tim's in Italy at the moment (lucky fellow!) and in his email, he asked how the monkeys were doing? Figured he's referring to our kids as we don't have any of the tree-hopping furry kind. As a parent, I'm a receipient of a variety of looks from my troop every day. Actually there's only one monkey, the other two are a dog and a bull. While I'm at it, I might as well share that I'm a snake and Tim's a rabbit. So you see, it's my job to go around and bite everyone.
Today I received quite a few dagger looks. The type where it's almost a battle of the eyes...to see who will blink first. For special emphasis, sometimes it's appropriate to deliberately narrow the eyes to try and magnify the intensity of the stare. Those are no fun, of course. Fortunately, I also received my daily dose of smiling eyes that say 'I love you'. Then there are the doe eyes effect which spells 'pleeeeeeassse' ever so clearly. Quite irresistible - can melt heart type. I also get the 'Gimme a break' look. Today there was also the furrowed eyebrow 'I am mad at you' look. Fume..fume...fume. I could almost see the smoke coming of the ears.
Eyes are great. I think they're like a pair of windows into the soul.
Next time I get mad, I'm going to run to the mirror to see what I look like!

Monday, September 26, 2005

Feeling guilty.....
I felt compelled to post about those 'exercises'. This is because it's been 8 days since I last exercised.....physically that is. Naughty me. So I need to console myself that hopefully I have 'exercised' in some other ways.
Time just flew by last week.
This is also related to the other posting about how God is outside of time. Yet I am so trapped by time. One of the most frequent prayer requests from my BSF ladies is for better time management. One lady's 'joking' request was that there would be 2 more hours in a day so she could accomplish all she needed to do.
Really need to go for a run.....but no time today......sigh
The 10 Daily Exercises - by George Eifermen
1. A Good Eye Exercise
See also the perfection in others. See the everlasting beauty in human kindness.
2. A Good Tongue Exercise
Speak from the heart instead of the mouth.
3. A Good Facial Exercise
A smile oft repeated.
4. Hearing Exercise
When we speak we learn nothing. Listening is the teacher. Then speak.
5. Brain Exercise
Think only constructive thoughts. Good reading is to the mind what exercise
is to the body.
6. Leg Exercise
Walk toward knowledge, wisdom, health, and brotherhood of all men.
7. Breathing Exercise
Inhale the great works of music, art, literature, and philosophy. Exhale
spitefulness and other negative thoughts.
8. Strength Exercise
Have the strength to endure when things are unendurable, to pass the next
test after failing the recent one.
9. Heart Exercise
Have the heart to "constructively" improve self, our environment,
community, and country.
10. Soul Exercise
We are never alone.
Walk with God.
The Infinite Attention of God
Picked up what I think is another gem from CS Lewis. It helps me have a high view of God.
He writes:

God is not hurried along in the time stream of this universe any more than an author is hurried along the imaginary time of his own novel. He has infinite attention to spare for each one of us........
If you picture time as a straight line which we have to travel, then you must picture God as the whole page on which the line is drawn. We come to the parts of the line one by one: we have to leave A behind before we get to B, and cannot reach C until we leave B behind. God, from above or outside or all round, contains the whole line, and sees it all.

Isn't that a great illustration? I think so.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Matt's Initiative... should I praise him or puke?
Let me tell me, yesterday was very tiring. I've been doing kiddie parties for my boys for some time now. But yesterday's party was something else. The baby in the our family, Matt (turning 8 yrs next week), had merrily issued birthday invite notes to his friends in school and then after that, told me about it. We did discuss possible dates but he had pre-empted me.

During dinner at my in-laws one evening:
Me: Hey Matt, your birthday's coming up in a few weeks.
M: I know. My friends are coming for my party.
Me: Yeah, who would you like to invite?
M: (rattles off a string of names I can't really remember...)
Me: OK, sure...we'll have to get some invite cards and put all the stuff down.
M: I know, I already did that.
Me: You did? What do you mean?
M: I already gave them to my friends.
Me: Gave what?
M: The invitation cards.
Me: But I haven't got them yet.
M: It's OK, I made them myself.
Me: Oh no....what did you put on it?
(my mind was racing, of course......when? who? where? why didn't you ask me first??????)

After extracting the details from Matt during dinner, we discover that the venue was at my in-laws' nice big garden BUT they won't be around because they're travelling that weekend. It's a little awkward but they were very gracious about the whole thing, though disappointed they won't be around to enjoy it.

So I had a few days to get 'ready' but still no idea who exactly he invited. I had to keep asking him to get his friends to RSVP. What if 30 kids showed up? What if none showed up? I did receive a few calls from his friends and their mothers.......enquiring very carefully if there was a party etc. They weren't very sure by looking at the invite cards. Matt had taken some A4 white paper, cut it up and hand-written it...........embellishing them with his artwork of balloons, cakes etc. Apparently, one of the curious statements he had written was 'Parents are allowed to stay'.

Everything turned out alright. I had an exhausting time controlling a bunch of 8 yr olds wielding a bat desperately trying to bat that pinata. I thought they were going to bat each other or that I would be seeing stars instead. I was dead tired yesterday........more dead than tired, and am still wondering if I should praise him for his initative. The joy of being a parent.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Inner Me vs Outer Me
Been listening to Jamiroquai's latest album - I really like it. There's one song where the lyrics go, "There's a hole in my soul and I'm losing control.....". This may sound kind of 'off' but I somehow connected it to something I had read. It defined character as what we are when nobody sees us. Well, the funny but true thing is that we are real good about spending time and effort on our outer appearances. You know, the clothes we wear, the things we say, the impressions of ourselves we want to leave with people......it can be like a facade.

I think there will always be a gap between what we are inside and what we appear to be to other people. That's just the way we are. If it's a small gap, that's ok. But if somewhere along the way, the gap gets bigger and bigger.....that's probably not ok. Only the Big Boss up there knows the inner me. I find that comforting....and frightening at the same time. Nowhere to hide.

So the thing is. I should spend at least the same amount of time taking care of inner me as I do on outer me. Probably should be more time - after all, that's what counts. It's been said that circumstances never make or break anyone; they merely reveal the person.

Back to the song. What if there is a hole in my soul? What if I'm leaking.......very slowly, but still leaking? Nobody would really know.........except the Big Boss up there. From what I understand, no leaky hole will go unplugged.........not for long anyway.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Goodbye to the last of the gerbils.....
This morning I bade farewell to a beloved extended member of the Tan family. Gerbils are rodents that are incredibly fascinating to watch but not very friendly. Our family's adventures with animals started with the gift of a pair of gerbils about four years ago. We were passive mid-wives in the delivery of 5 pregnancies and probably at least 30 gerbils - watching them from birth, through parenthood, incest and finally death. The kids have learnt so much by being able to witness this circle of life.

Along the way, we've also had the privelege of caring for a host of God's creatures from the animal kingdom. One of my favourite hamsters was a gentle fat little guy we called "Xiao Long Bao". Then there was the guinea pig we got from the SPCA we named "Fei Zai". I never knew guinea pigs could communicate with all those different types of squeaks. There was the ' Food! - I want food now! ' squeak and the ' I'm lonely....come play with me' squeak. Amazing.

The chickens were quite stupid though. After feeding them day in and day out, they still didn't recognise who I was. I didn't know how to clip their wings so they kept escaping (yes, they can fly somewhat) from their designated corner in the garden. For the time we had them, the back area of the house was like a bomb zone. Never knew when one was going to step on chicken poop.

Then Tim went on this aquatic creature phase. It started with some fish he'd caught in the longkang somewhere. There was this tilapia that just kept eating and eating, growing and growing. We finally released it back a bigger longkang because it got so big and fat. Then there was the dozens of koi. Most of those koi are unfortunately, now buried in various parts of the garden. We discovered a 'lesser heron' (that's the proper name) had been stopping by to try and eat them. We kept finding dead koi with sharp stab wounds on their body. One morning, the lesser heron got trapped in the netting. We put it a cage and observed it for a few days. That beak is something else - great for stabbing people.

We also had some happy times with these crayfish we caught at Upper Peirce Reservoir. They hang out at the rocks near the waters edge. Just put a piece of sausage on a satay stick and they come crawling out of the rocks to eat it. Then you have to be super fast and grab them with a net. It's really fascinating watching creatures and their eating habits. I had to buy live prawns & feeder fish to keep the crayfish diet happy, exciting and balanced. It's a bit like watching National Geographic but at home at your own fish tank. We also had too many luohan. They were vicious - and enjoyed eating tiny bits of leftover steak!

Well, most of our extended Tan family members of the animal kingdom have come and gone. Only Baobei remains. She's turning two years this month and still as 'manja' (needing to be pampered) as ever. Think she knows that she's the daughter the the family and loving it!

Sunday, September 18, 2005

My dad gave me a collection of CS Lewis books for my birthday. Was skimming through it today and came across this. Found it really thought- provoking and a very interesting angle on how I could evangelise. I have quite a number of very dear pre-believing friends.

One of the great difficulties is to keep before the audience's mind the question of
Truth. They always think you are recommending Christianity not because it is true but because it is good. ........One must keep on pointing out that Christianity is a statement which, if false, is of no importance, and if true, of infinite importance. The one thing it cannot be is moderately important.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

I can't seem to tag on OC blog anymore - get an error msg.
But I need to say a bunch of thank yous.
I think it's amazing, and wonderful, that Chris, Asher & I share the same birthday.
Happy Birthday Chris!
Happy Birthday Asher!
Big thank you to Chris for the really yummy cake. It was devoured at the facilitators' meeting today. ALL the guys had second helpings!
Also want to thank those who wished on the tagboard - Chris, Pong, Yiling & Mel. Thank you too Claris, as I was walking towards you guys just now & also Cheryl, for linking this blog. Thanks Patrick & gang for the card.

Patrick put 2 candles on my cake and that really made my day. It's wonderful to be 20 yrs old. (actually that doesn't really compute because Elliott is 13 yrs and that would mean I was 7 yrs old when I delivered him - but let's just overlook that).

Some funny things that happened today. While I was sitting in the car with the windows down waiting for the boys, I was blessed by a bird on the arm. It's not the kind of blessing I was hoping for. Orangey, moist & splattered all over. Fortunately I had tissue on hand to quickly wipe it away. Good thing I didn't smell funny after that. Then at lunch with my in-laws, I had a cake that had an extra candle on it! I'm already in denial about being 20 yrs old (ok lah, 20 yrs twice over). I couldn't wait for the birthday song to be finish so I could protest about the extra candle!!

Thursday, September 15, 2005

All I wanted to do was leave a comment and the next thing I know, I've created my own blog.